Monster Girl Writes

The time has come...WordPress

2011-08-06T22:06:00.003+10:00

You guys! I'm no longer blogging over here! Well, that's sort of a lie, since that's what I'm doing right now. However, I've created a Wordpress site that's going to be more professional (so I have something to link to editors and put in author bios for my freelance writing work!) and less anonymous. It's all a little weird for me, but there you have it. Apparently WordPress is the platform to use for sites that also have a professional function, and it just seemed easier to start from scratch then do an overhaul here. Anyway, my new site is here at http://siancampbell.wordpress.com/ so take note/change bookmarks/add the new site on bloglovin' etc. I'll leave this post up here for a while before I think about deleting this blog entirely....I'm not quite up for that sort of emotional upheaval yet! Don't ask me what's with all the pink in the new site either...finding a theme that didn't suck and was at least sort of customisable, and was a good mix of professional and fun...nightmare. For now this is as good as it gets. Anyway, I really love you guys and have loved blogging over here. Please don't be a stranger.

lots of furry crazy Monster Love,

Monster Girl

TiNA in Trouble

2011-07-08T13:05:00.003+10:00

So if you were around these parts last October, you might remember me gushing about the This is Not Art Festival, an annual independent umbrella arts festival in Newcastle presenting many "mini" festivals such as the National Young Writers' Festival as well as sound, music and theatre festivals and more.

"This is Not Art (TINA) is a supercharged convergence of writers, performers, thinkers, independent and industry musicians, creative researchers, electronic artists, dilettantes, and DIY culture makers in a showcase featuring over 400 local, national and international artists." - TiNA website.

At the moment, TiNA is in trouble. They've just been told that the funding they've been relying on has not been granted this year, severely compromising the festival's ability to remain one of the leading national arts festivals. That money, which has been granted to TiNA for over a decade (According to a study, 13-year old TiNA brings in thousands of visitors and $1.5 million into the local economy each year) is vital in order to keep the festival free for its attendees, pay event co-ordinators, pay for sound, lighting and other costs and ensure participating artists are able to produce their work.

With only twelve weeks until the festival, past and future attendees as well as those interested in supporting the arts are rallying to keep TiNA up on her feet. Those interested can pledge a donation, payable only if (when!) the target is reached. At the moment, even though the Festival has lost $18,000 in funding the target has been set low at an achievable $4000, though hopefully we can surpass this and make sure TiNA gets everything she needs. I hope any readers out there interested in supporting Australia's young writers will join me in donating. I can't really explain to anyone that hasn't been to the festival before just what it means for those that attend and have attended in the past.

Live long and prosper, friends...and help TiNA prosper too! x

R.I.P Veronica

2011-07-05T20:03:00.007+10:00

Long time blog readers (do I have any?!) might remember my Macbook Veronica, whom I've enjoyed a four year love-affair with. She's pretty much my main squeeze, my first lady...she's even in my blog header!

For some fucked up reason I thought it would be a good idea to spill milk all. over. her keyboard the other night. Because, you know, I'm a tool. You can imagine it: everything becoming slow motion, my voice morphing into Darth Vader as "NOOOOOOOO!" roars out of my mouth and I scramble with my hands to do - what? There is nothing to do and the screen flickers, and in an instant my faithful friend, my little girl, my magnificent mac is gone forever.

We had some times. All my blogs were written on Veronica. All my awful PhotoBooth photos of me and my cat were taken on Veronica. Guys, I attach a lot of sentiment and personality to inanimate objects (because, you know, I'm a tool) and this was like a knife in the goddamn heart. She was getting on in age - four years is a very old age for a little Macbook, but you always think you have more time with someone. It's strange the things that flicked through my mind when I realised I'd lost everything: all the photos of The Necronaut (an old boyfriend) and I, was the first and the oddest thought: I don't particularly feel a strong need for these photos, but still, even though I'd deleted them from everywhere else I always had it in the back of my mind that they were still in Veronica's iPhoto, "just in case." (Heavens knows in case of what. I'm a hoarder.) Next I realised I had lost all the bookmarks I've been keeping for almost half a decade - gift ideas for family and friends, favourite recipes...finally I realised I'd lost articles I was working on, and - and...Plants vs Zombies. Nightmare!

Luckily through miraculous good fortune (how is that for some sweet-ass tautology?!) RE: tax time, generosity etc, I was able to go out and buy a new Macbook the next day, and today I bought a hard drive caddy ($9, guys! Nine. F*cking. Dollars!) so now Veronica's drive is all hooked up to my new baby, who I have christened Veruca - after the awesome alt-rock band, not that spoilt bitch from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, alright internet? Are we clear? -and I've got all my data back, including bookmarks!

Guys, for the first time in a few months, I'm not completely convinced that the world is a total write-off. Sometimes it does okay. In honour of my baby Veronica, who has been my left-hand woman for so long, and in celebration of the new era Veruca is heralding, I think I'm going to heat up some Rekorderlig Winter (apple, vanilla and cinnamon) Cider and watch Reality Bites. Get it? Apple cider? Reality Bites? Because Veronica was an appl- okay, you guys get it I'm sure. Goodnight Monster Friends. Keep your technology safe and don't cry over spilt milk. x

(An Archie Comic cap I found one day - Veronica was in fact named after Veronica from Archie. It immediately filled me with regret for not making this my blog header & calling my blog, "Veronica's World." Wouldn't that have been the perfect blog name?! Though I guess I would have had to change it to "Veruca's World" now anyway.)

Emerging Writers' Festival

2011-06-19T15:06:00.004+10:00

Hello there all, long time no blog. I've been somewhat distracted by life, university, figurative heartbreak, a lack of motivation/direction etc, as well as a recent open heart surgery and subsequent hospitalisation for some literal, medical heartbreak I've mentioned before a bit on here. But the week before I was in hospital, I was in Melbourne for the Emerging Writers' Festival! And let me just tell you it was the perfect vacation before a 12 week stint in bed, albeit a slightly nerdy vacation but that's just how I like my downtime - filled with literary discussion, poetry readings and dinner parties!

As networking, blog-sharing, tweeting and general exchange of writing is such a fundamental part of any writers festival but particularly the Emerging Writers' Festival, I've had my blog link clicked on a lot more often in recent times, and felt pretty guilty about what everyone might find. What a site of neglect! So, to appeal to my new audience and to assure the old audience I am not, in fact, deceased, I figured I would blog about my time in Melbourne and the Festival itself.

On the first night of the Emerging Writers' Festival at the First Word event in Federation Square, I was adopted by festival panelists Philip and his partner Julian, who spotted me standing awkwardly to the side of the BMW Edge auditorium, sipping my wine and eying off the Title temporary bookstore fearfully (I was apprehensive of the inclusion of the temporary bookstore at all festival events because I suspected I would end up spending too much money there. Which, of course, I did.) They decided immediately to rescue me as they'd been in the weird world of not-really-knowing-anyone the previous year and recognised my predicament. Within minutes I was sitting down with them, their friend Dion - who I was delighted to see again after meeting at the This is Not Art/National Young Writers Festivals last September! (Even more delighted when he happily shared some of his Rekorderlig cider with me - what a guy!) Then out of nowhere my friend Elizabeth, another TiNA friend, sat right in front of us and a night that could have gone either way was suddenly filled with friends old and new, bubbly and delicious writerly entertainment. The rest of the festival followed suit - I met the lovely and hilarious Scottish writer in residence Alan Bissett and had quite the chat about Neighbours, made a new friend who is from Brisbane - kismet - and ended up going op-shopping with him (he works in legendary Brisbane indie bookstore Avid, you should check out his blog,) I made poetry out of lego, I was directed to a tram by the wonderful festival director Lisa Dempster (See! Look how good at directing she is! All kinds of directing!) and, you guys, I drank so. much. cider and wine. Like it became this really weird habit. Every hour was wine hour. I don't even know why but as soon as I landed in Melbourne I decided I just really needed to drink a lot of white wine?

Best Festival Event

The Not Your Nanna's Slide Night was a highlight for me as it involved more wine, hilarious slides (as the name would indicate) and it was the night I got to meet Alan Bissett and my new Brisbane pal James, as well as festival producer Emmy Rose, and got to hang out with Voiceworks editor JoJo, who I had met at the First Word event. Making new friends is without a doubt the best part of these type of things!

Best Book Buy

I bought a lot of books, you guys. A lot of books. I'm going to cheat and give two the top position - the two volumes of the Reader I picked up. The Reader is the Festival's publication for and by the so-named Emerging Writers who attend and host the festival, and I got a great deal for buying both at once, at the Title temporary bookshop. I was delighted to see pieces by so many of the great people I'd met over the course of the festival, including a piece by as well as a piece about my new friend Philip Thiel, who as I mentioned earlier rescued me on my very first night!

Best Eat

Okay, not strictly festival related but you know I like talking about food. On one of my first nights in Melbourne my friend Kira and I hit up the Vegie Bar out on Brunswick Street, and it was everything our vegetarian souls had dreamed of. It was packed out too - we had to go wait in the bar courtyard for a seat to become available. (No problem there - 2 Brothers Gypsy Pear Cider, anyone?) When we finally ate, the portions were huge, the prices not insane, and the family communal dining style really fun. Probably my new favourite restaurant. Plus it was right next to PolyEster Books, my new favourite bookstore, so look how neatly that worked out?

Also, one night when I was really hungry and in desperate need of pasta I decided to just wander the streets of Melbourne until I saw a sign that said "Pasta" - which sounds simple enough, and when you're not LOOKING you see pasta places absolutely everywhere but when you ARE looking they're nowhere at all. Eventually I found this place near the Festival Hub called Equinox - I believe this is the place, though the photos look like a completely different place to me - and there was a sign outside - $10.95 pasta with a free drink. Sold. They brought me the biggest, yummiest place of vegetarian spaghetti and a glass of white wine (of course) and it was the perfect meal after a long hungry hunt out in the cold. Plus there was a cute boy eating next to me, so.

Okay so I just wrote a lot more about food than the other stuff so I'm going to stop blogging and leave you with a few photos!

Glad to be with you again blog friends! x

This was my lego poetry contribution - please note the glass in the background! It never stops flowing in Melbourne.

Happy birthday Mumsy

2011-03-30T07:00:00.002+10:00

Dear Mum,

Thanks for always giving me milk in the Supergirl glass when we lived at Kedron, and for always giving me lifts and ringing me the other day when I sounded upset to ask if I wanted you to come pick me up. (I was fine but it was still nice.) Thanks for letting me wear my favourite of your sunglasses in the car even though you forgot yours and you kind of needed some for driving. Thanks for always getting my favourite pasta bake jars at the shops. Thanks for feeding Molly and putting my wet clothes in the dryer when I forget. Thanks for always asking how the gig I went to was even though you never have even heard of the band that played. Thanks for shouting me donuts and giving me change for coffee in the mornings. Thanks for taking me to the library or picking up all the books I put on hold. Thanks for spending practically your whole birthday in hospital with me today. Thanks for accepting me, even if I make it hard sometimes. Mostly thanks for perpetually stalking my blog despite my protests, so that I know you'll read these words eventually. Happy birthday, Mum.

Sian

aka Monster Girl

My favourite photo of Mum, 1974

Things I Love Thursday

2011-02-24T23:19:00.003+10:00

Lately I feel like I'm tired all the time. Like, not even enough energy to think thoughts beyond "Where's the closest place I could get away with having a sneaky nap in?" So until I have anything remotely worthy of being read to post, I'll leave you with the things that have been putting a smile on my face:

The cuddly feel of flannel blankets. Coffee. A wonderful friend and co-worker bringing me coffee at work (and coming out at odd hours to keep me company or go out for drinks, and whose iPod is the perfect soundtrack to work to.) Finding a book that's been hard to find, for an absolute steal. Getting off my arse and getting an article published. Cider. A pancake date with a friend I hadn't caught up with in far too long. The Like playing an amazing set at the Zoo. My new snuggly jumper. Wearing party hats just-because. Skating and making more skate-friends. Customers at work who tell me they like my earrings and/or glasses. Buying my ticket to Belle and Sebastian. Having an awesome Valentines Day with flowers and chinese food and candles and dvds. Making my way through my uni reading list before uni even starts. Holding an impromptu ukulele concert at work (turning a table into a stage!) Watching The Kids Are Alright with my Mum. Playing Beat It on my bass. Art galleries. The new frankie. Socks with frills. The girl at a club who came up and "had to tell me how absolutely adorable I am." !! Discovering awesome friends' of friends' bands. Skins. Portlandia. Tea and gossip with the siblings. Lit magazine launches (and free champagne!) Making a playlist for someone. The night-link bus. Ice cream and lollipops.

To market, to market

2011-02-09T08:00:00.001+10:00

Every Wednesday in Brisbane, the Farmers Market sets up camp in the square outside the library in the top of Queen Street mall. I love slipping away from writing in the city, or jumping on the bus on a break from uni, and disappearing into fresh produce, flowers, macarons, truffles, herbs, and fresh lemonade. This week the best dude friend Jon reminded me (I've been meaning to blog about the markets for a while) and we went for a roam in his lunch hour. Having just filled up on dodgy food court pasta I was able to restrain myself from spending all my pocket money on fresh treats, and indulged in photography instead so you could all share in this little joy. (Jon's a true blogger's bestie, the kind that doesn't mind if I occasionally - read, constantly - need to take snaps of our dinner or outings or what have you. Fill your lives with these sort of people immediately if you haven't already, fellow bloggers.)

I wish that Valentines fell on a Wednesday this year so I could pick up a bouquet and some treats for my hot date (My friend Laura and I have wild plans of watching Valentines Day by candlelight with some takeout, haha.) Maybe some other time. We're Sofia Coppola worshippers - our first "hot date" was to see her new film Somewhere - and I imagine we'd have great fun eating our weight in macarons from the market and pretending we're in the film Marie Antoinette.
Tell me about the markets in your cities, readers!

The Ethical Tapdance: On Leather Shoes

2011-01-18T14:26:00.005+10:00

"I find shoes difficult to be ethical about - one just can't seem to avoid leather. One is trapped, ultimately." - Morrissey.

Long-term readers of Monster Girl Writes will know that I've been a vegetarian since I was fourteen years old. It feels like I've been vegetarian my entire life and sometimes it weirds me out when I realise it hasn't even been a decade yet. Still, eight or nine years is a long time in the world of a 22 year old.

Over the years there have been lots of changes I've implemented. Choices I've made, requests I've put out to my family. Our household now only purchases free range eggs, and considering my mother is definitely not the type to sign up for any product which might cost even a dollar more, it was something I was incredibly happy about. (I'd be happier if we could finally get the chickens I've wanted my entire life, but hey.) We now buy recycled printing paper, or at least it's the paper I use personally. I'd love it if we could make the jump to organic milk, but we'll see. There have been lots of little things. I like knowing that when I move out in the next year or two some of these simple changes will continue.

With all aspects of my lifestyle, I like to be thoroughly informed and educated. Choosing either the popular or unpopular path makes no difference to me as long as I choose with consideration and with the understanding that I'm making the best choice for me. What I put on or in my body, where I want to live, how I want to live, whether I want to ever get married or have children. Sometimes the choices I make are traditional, often they're not. But they're always heavily considered. Which brings me to leather.

Over the past year or so, I've been really trying to get a grasp on how I feel about wearing leather. Before then, I didn't see a huge connection between vegetarianism and wearing leather. Vegetarianism is choosing to not consume animal, however still electing to consume animal products (in my case, ones that are produced as ethically as possible.) Now, though I still believe that leather doesn't interfere with a vegetarian lifestyle technically, I'm not so sure it doesn't interfere with this vegetarian's lifestyle ethically.

It may be a bit of an anticlimax to tell you at this point that I have decided to continue wearing and purchasing leather shoes. You probably thought this was going the other way, didn't you? After considerable thought, discussion and a bit of study, I've concluded the following:

Leather shoes are hugely sustainable and last for a long, long time, reducing consumption.
It is not the easiest task to abstain from leather when so many accessories and clothes use leather in some way, often in ways you can't pick up on.
Good faux-leather shoes are often wildly expensive (moreso than even the more expensive leather shoes I own.)
The cattle are being slaughtered for their meat. To wear leather is to use the waste.
Leather is better for the environment than some leather alternatives, and is often able to be recycled.
Leather, like eggs and milk, is able to be produced ethically - ie without the animal actually being killed for it. This argument is similar to vegetarians who are comfortable to eating animals if they've died of natural causes.

Some of these arguments may be weaker than others. Some I need to do more research on. All, though, make sense to me and lead me to the decision I've made for the time being - a thought-out decision, not one of convenience. So, while I'm no longer fully comfortable wearing leather, I will continue to do so. Because for me personally at this point in my life, it seems like the "best" (not necessarily 100% "right") choice.

What are your thoughts on wearing animal products, Monsters?

Me in my leather docs and Beatles bag, October 2010. Taken by bestie and photo-gal extraordinaire, Zoe.

Queensland Floods

2011-01-16T02:37:00.002+10:00

Howdy Monster Readers. I've had a few emails from some of you guys asking about me and my loved ones after the recent flood shenanigans here in Queensland. I thought I should check in and update you all - I'm totally fine, I live in a really good area for natural disasters. Nothing ever hits my beautiful little valley too hard - though I hope I haven't jinxed it us on that one now! For a while there we were sort of trapped with no way in or out with a couple of bridges overflowing, but in the grand scheme of things, a couple of hours is nothing. Strangely enough even out here there seems to be a bread shortage, or maybe we've all been too slack to get to the shops. No official word on that yet. ;)

Seriously, things here in Queensland have been pretty rough. On a personal note, my work was forced to close with other shops in the area evacuating and sandbagging their doors. My father's job relies on the weather and he was out of work for a long time there, since it's been raining for a long, long time. My cat, Molly Ringwald, who is afraid of everything after being terrorised for a long time by a neighbourhood bully cat, was too scared by the noise of the storms to even eat. My pregnant godsister had to evacuate, several workmates have loved ones who have lost a lot...it's all just crazy stuff. But that's nothing compared to what's going on outside of Brisbane.

It's all just surreal to me. A family that lost both the husband and wife's mothers as well as their baby girl. A boy terrified of water losing his life after making the emergency workers take his younger brother first. People losing every single possession they own, having ten minutes warning before an inland tsunami took everything.

There are several ways to help, some ultimately more effective than others. I know in Brisbane, thousands upon thousands of people are registering to volunteer to get in there and help clean up. This makes me so proud of my city. However, without proper shots, good gumboots and other equipment, a lot of people are actually being turned down or are unable to volunteer at this time.

Obviously, most of my readers are not locals, so if you're interested in helping out, what Brisbane and the more affected areas really needs is money. It's easy to feel like money doesn't go anywhere and donating a little amount won't change anything, but all the little donations add up and with so many houses to be rebuilt, emergency funds to be distributed and so many unimaginable bills to pay, money is mostly the only thing actually needed at this point. I donated what I felt like I could afford after doing some quick budgeting a few days ago, and plan on donating a similar amount next paycheck as well. If any readers out there can spare a few dollars - and seriously, it can just be that much - you can donate here.

Anyway, that's the situation in a nutshell from Monster HQ. I hope any Australian readers (the flooding is now seriously affecting 5 states, from what I last heard) are doing okay - please check in via the comments! And for everyone else - how much about this are you hearing on your news stations? I'm just really curious. We've just heard Obama checking in and offering support so I'm sure you American readers are hearing at least a little about it?

Brisbane city, flooding. Taken by me on the 12th of January.

Happy New Year, Monsters!

2011-01-07T23:15:00.009+10:00

What, it's a week into 2011 already? But I'm not done with Christmas yet! I hope you guys all had an outrageous New Year's - mine was pretty fantastic. I spent it at a house party with friends - I wore a dress covered in sequins and a tinsel wreath and danced like I was about to lose my legs. At midnight we set off sparklers and confetti and blew party horns, hugged and kissed, and revelled. If your New Years' Eve was as happy as mine then you had a good night! Two-thousand-and-ten was a pretty big, awesome year for me. I thought I'd record some of the highlights here for you guys (and for myself, when I'm senile.) I did sooo much this year that this is only the tip of the iceberg, only what I can remember right now. I'll have to have a think and write a bigger list for myself, because this really was an amazing year - despite the shitty start!

In 2010, I //

Went antiquing, got incredibly drunk at a Starlight charity cocktail party with my ladies, headed to Redcliffe for seafood (well, vegetarian chow at a seafood joint in my case) and summer nights with my friends, pulled up my GPA at uni, went to the opening of Brisbane's Mana Bar, cuddled a Stormtrooper in the mall, dressed up in a fancy formal dress to watch the Oscars in my friend's living room, baked Baileys and Guinness cupcakes with green frosting for St Patrick's Day, a Death Star cake for Zoe's birthday and Pumpkin Spice cupcakes with cream cheese vanilla bean frosting for Halloween, started roller skating, made lots of derby friends and won a giant triple scoop tub of ice cream at the derby gay pride skate night, met Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Cupid from Xena, kissed Jareth from Labyrinth on my 22nd birthday, drove to Woodford for three days of music, yoga and mi goreng at Splendour in the Grass with my friends, scoured the Laneway markets and chugged coffee at the Flamingo Cafe with my bestie, wore my Ravenclaw scarf to the Harry Potter movie, flew to Newcastle for the National Young Writers Festival+This is Not Art Festivals and one of the best weekends of my life, was hospitalised multiple times and found out I need open heart surgery, watched my mother and brother graduate university, got paid for my writing for the first time, enjoyed the finest Burlesque performers Brisbane has to offer, started playing bass guitar, threw an impromptu mini bowling party when Jon got promoted, attended gallery opening after gallery opening and panel after panel, ate too much blue cheese and got drunk on free champagne, went to Brisbane's 2High Festival, broke into an abandoned military psychiatric ward, dressed up head to toe in balloons, had multiple sushi dates, hit the coast with friends and slept in a hammock on the deck of a beach house, spooned and canoodled with cute boys, ate the best brunch of my life, threw an Eggnog night for Christmas and made all my friends watch the Star Wars Holiday Special, decorated the best Christmas tree ever with my family, and rocked out to live music until my ears almost bled, so much music I can't even remember bands further back than a month ago.

In 2011 I will //

To be completely honest with you, readers - a lot of at least the start of this year is uncertain for me. At some point I'll be in hospital undergoing open heart surgery and I'll be in hospital and then recovery for about two months. I probably won't be able to go back to uni for at least the first semester, and as I'll be out of work for two months (and having just had surgery anyway) it looks like overseas travel in the first half of this year is out. It's all a big blank for me right now, and it's a little frustrating knowing I'm sort of forced to put my life on hold and will be bedridden and adventure-less for a while. However, I feel like hospital, surgery and scars notwithstanding, the first part of 2010 was substantially worse for me, and am psyched to see what 2011 will bring. However,

I hope 2011 will bring //

more amazing quality time with my best friends, the official start to my roller derby career, my writing printed in an offline publication (hopefully one that pays!), more music festivals and gigs (already got my tickets for the St. Jerome's Laneway Festival and The Like, and plan on heading back to Splendour in the Grass) as well as more writing festivals, starting yoga classes for real, improving my bass rock goddess skills, overseas travel of some description, my employment situation staying stable despite all the instability, an amazing time back at uni (whenever that will be), more time with the siblings, consistent and better-quality blogging, more meals out, more art shows and feminism panels, more beach trips (if only to rock my Star Wars swimwear, haha) and maybe a meal at my fave restaurant, the Hard Rock Cafe - didn't get there at all last year, which was a shame! A girl can hope.

Me, New Year's Eve

What do you want out of 2011, Monster Friends?

a holiday TiLT and what Santa brought me

2010-12-30T07:41:00.007+10:00

Hello Monsters! Did everyone have an awesome Christmas? Things I've been loving over the holidays:

gingerbread lipbalm, a weekend in Newcastle, christmas lights, brown fawn antlers, devouring Dash and Lily's Book of Dares in a day, vegan nut roast, boxing day brunch with Jon at the local Buzz Stop, leftover sweet potato bake, green tea with sugar, Molly Ringwald getting all excited about decorating the tree, sleep ins, finally getting paid for a writing job I did ages ago, Eisley's Christmas downloads, markets, playing Super Puzzle Fighter on the PS1 with my brother, A Muppets Christmas Carol, a mini beach vacation and sleeping in a hammock, pulling all-nighters with greasy tinned spaghetti and fried egg toasted sandwiches and trashy television, cute deer and owl ornaments from Typo, baking brownies, not being in hospital!

What did you all get for Christmas? This was some of my haul - I was spoilt, I know!

Monster Girl's 2010 Christmas Haul by monstergirl on Polyvore.com

It was a good year for this book nerd: two penguin classics and a kobo ereader filled with 100 classic books! Jon spoilt me with Dash and Lily's Book of Dares (after he got me the cute R2D2 swimsuit above and I told him he wasn't allowed to get me anything else!) which is by two of my favourite authors - the same authors who wrote Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist - and is wonderful! Zoe got me the Star Wars Wookie Cookies cookbook, which has been on my wishlist for years. There was squealing, I assure you. To wrap up my literary haul I got a Bell Jar tee, which is the comfiest thing in the world and is now my new favourite shirt.

On top of all of this I got another star wars swimsuit, my brother got me two awesome albums (Gypsy and the Cat's Gilgamesh and Washington's I Believe You Liar - I caught both acts at Splendour in the Grass this year and both were fantastic!) and my mum got me some spiced vanilla body butter, which I know feels amazing and which I'm told smells it, too. Adding to the list of almost-useless-but-cool-gifts-for-a-girl-who-can't-smell, I got the entire Harajuku Lovers snow bunnies collection - cutest bottles ever, which is saying a lot - I'm not really a perfume sort of person. To round it all up I got some space invaders undies in my stocking and a secret santa gave me a gorgeous silver deer necklace and some Christmas tea! Like I said: spoilt.

Was Santa as kind to you all? What was your favourite present this year? Fill me in, Monster Friends! x

Christmas in Brisbane

2010-12-25T07:00:00.001+10:00

Merry Christmas everyone! Here in rainy Brisbane it's early on Christmas morning. I'm watching A Muppets Family Christmas on Youtube and wrapping up a couple of last fiddly presents while I wait until a more appropriate hour to wake my brother up and open stockings with him. Unfortunately because I think my brother would tell me that an "appropriate hour" for a 21-year old boy is somewhere around 11am (on that note: who stays up into the early hours of Christmas Day playing WoW with friends? My brother, that's who.) I thought it would be fun in the meantime to compile a list of some of the ways I've been celebrating Christmas in my city this year.

Cult Christmas Movies

We have a few cult cinemas scattered around Brisbane at the moment, and I always try and catch their festive screenings. Last year I think I mentioned they screened the Star Wars Holiday Special, and this year they were running a double screening of D-grade classics Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and Silent Night Bloody Night.

Black XMAS

This year, music venue The Zoo in affiliation with lots of other Fortitude Valley staples in their block held a Black Christmas (I really can't stand using the "X-word", even if it's the title they chose) party - the dress code was "goth Christmas", and The Zoo put on bands and DJs all night, Flamingos cafe served special black chocolate mud muffins, art galleries got into it. The whole project made me really appreciate Brisbane all the more. What a close-knit, music crazy, rad little city.

Wooloongabba Antique Centre Christmas Party

In early December this month the Antique Centre, aka one of my favourite stores in the entire Brisbane radius, decked their halls and put on their own Christmas party. There were sales on their vintage clothing, furniture and other awesome goods (I felt like buying a typewriter, vintage Brisbane travel poster and 1960's Batman board game to put under the tree for myself!) as well as free champagne and nibbles, festive lollies and platters in every nook of the store, and carollers singing Australian Christmas tunes. It was kind of a perfect night!

Christmas Markets

There's actually quite a few Christmas markets spread out all around Brisbane in the month leading up to Christmas. The dude-bestie and I hit up the South Bank Christmas Night Markets earlier this week. Carolers, street performers, and lots of potential last minute gift ideas - although I was pretty good this year and didn't really have any last minute shopping to do at all! Which is good, because who wants to brave manic crowds? At the South Bank markets there was no shoving and screaming - just Christmas cheer beside our city's manmade beach. :)

Free Christmas in the City

Again, there are so many lovely free things to do in Brisbane City for Christmas if you keep an ear and an eye out. Along with the carollers in the mall and the Christmas displays in the Myer window, there are also free concerts, performances, Christmas story readings, free gift wrapping stations, and all sorts of things happening around the place. Jon and I (he's been my Christmas partner in crime this year!) went to a circus show with carols in King George Square earlier this week and a few of the acts were really amazing. I was wearing giant brown deer antlers at the time though, so spent most of the evening smiling at the baby in front of me who was completely transfixed by them!

Christmas Lights

I'm not sure if everywhere in Australia does it (I think they do?) but we have a Christmas lights competition here put on by a radio station and so many houses go all out! It's fun to go on drives to check them all out. A lot of churches really pimp it out (For only $3, how about a photo of you with Mary and Joseph?) but they're often the ones with the best lights! There's this one property a few suburbs over that decorate their entire garden and open it to the public to walk through, and set up displays like miniature Christmas villages. It's like being in a Winter Wonderland. I was pretty mesmerised and off in my own little Christmas-trance as soon as we stepped onto the premises.

Christmas At Home

One of my favourite ways I celebrated Christmas this year was to throw an Eggnog Party for all my friends - I designed and made up special Christmas mix cds for everyone, (Patti Smith, Bob Dylan, Radiohead, Beck, Joan Jett and more singing their festive hearts out!) ordered in the Home Alone video game for Sega, and made more Eggnog and brandy milkshakes than I could keep count of. Santa made a special appearance halfway through the night, and as it wound down we threw on the Star Wars Holiday Special.

Here's my family's Christmas tree! It's kind of insane this year. It's so heavy we can't even keep it upright properly. We get a real one each year and normally get large pine branches - this year thanks to good fortune we have a massive tree that looks like it should be occupied by woodland creatures. My favourite sort of tree! It's much more impressive in person, I promise :)

We decorated last night, making Mum happy - she loves putting the tree up on Christmas eve! Molly was pretty happy too. What cat needs presents when there's boxes to climb in and baubles to play with and strings of light to get caught up in?
Merry Christmas everyone! x

Why do you let me stay here?

2010-12-20T12:30:00.003+10:00

Why do you let me stay here, all by myself? Why don't you come and play here? I'm just sitting on the shelf!

Hey guys! Sorry I've been so awol - I was in hospital all week (I just went in for a routine two hour procedure and then my body clearly decided the idea of meals and foxtel in bed for several days was too good of a thing to pass up!) and before that I was at the beach with some friends! Now that my sunburn is fading and I'm no longer covered in blood and tubes and machines, I'd like to return to the land of the living - if you'll all still have me? I'll be back with some sort of substantial blog soon, I hope. Hope you're all enjoying the Christmas season! x

R.I.P Troubadour

2010-12-06T14:40:00.005+10:00

Even though the news hit Brisbane early last month, the bombshell that one of the city's favourite music venues was shutting its doors only just really got to me personally last night, out at the Jezabels gig formally scheduled for the Troubadour and instead held at The Zoo. As Jezabels' guitarist Sam Lockwood put it, "We're glad to be here...but damn it's a shame about the Troubadour." And it really is. The Troubadour was one of the first music venues I ever really caught a gig at (excluding, of course, all the big concerts at the Brisbane Entertainment Centre in my alternative soft pop-punk/emo/metal rock teen years) and probably the first gig I ever went to solo. It's where I first saw The Art when they were still The Follow and Bertie Blackman when no-one really knew who she was yet, where I curled up in the comfiest tattered old lounge chair in existence screaming lewd propositions toward the stage to make a friend in a band laugh. It's where I escaped to in the awkward year when I was living in a dingy apartment, with public transportation at my disposal and a reluctance to be at home. It's where my shy self first crawled out of her shell to chat to people in the crowd that she didn't know but looked like they were up for a great conversation. It's where I first fell in love with live music properly, not just going to big concerts where you could barely see but needed to go because you were fifteen and fangasming over the bassist, or gigs your friends were playing, but live music for the sake of it, because it was easy to disappear into the Troubadour or the Globe any night you just needed to get out of the house, pay ten bucks at the door and discover something new. It's where I peed with one eye keeping guard out into the laneway alley beneath through a window that was often broken, and squeezed tentatively past any other girl that wanted to use the shoebox-sized facilities. Forget about stopping to check your reflection on a busy night. It's where I fell in love with the sort of music I'm still in love with today.

All things must pass, and there's no shortage of great venues still left in Brisbane, but The Troub will be sorely missed. At least The Zoo (possibly my favourite Brisbane venue) is still around to pick up the slack. The Jezabels, by the way, were amazing.

Five Gifts from Outside The Box

2010-11-25T14:42:00.001+10:00

Hello, folks! It's now officially one month until Christmas, and to help you all out with your shopping I thought I'd offer up some possibly different ideas to help you if you're stuck in that "Goddamn, I'll just get her a dodgy unauthorised biography about Rupert Grint because she already has everything and she won't shut up about Rupert Grint since the latest Harry Potter flick" rut. What? Have you seen the latest Harry Potter flick? He is dreamy, okay? And when Harry and Hermione danced, how cute was that? Um, sorry. Oh, and I'm not dissing unauthorised biographies. They make for some awesome plane reads and more than a few fangirl giggles. The dudebestie Jon got me a Xena biography earlier this year and it was the best surprise present ever. But just in case you don't want to go down that route, might I suggest...

A Women's Shelter

Through Oxfam Unwrapped, you can help pay for a women's crisis center in Papua New Guinea. You get a card sent out to you (if you're not buying online you can pick one up from your local Oxfam shop) and you get to give that to your recipient. Now, on triple j they were talking about gifts like this and how they're sort of the perfect gift because nobody will cop to being uncharitable so they'll have to pretend they like it even if they don't. Which, okay, is pretty much true, but I'd suggest only getting this for someone that you know would truly appreciate it. Here at Monster Girl Writes we do not endorse "Cop Out Christmas Gifts". Though, come to think of it, if you have someone in your life you HAVE to buy a gift for and really have no idea, I suppose a charitable idea like this is better than some material crap they'll never use, and let's face it, if you don't care about someone that much to begin with, giving to something worthwhile like this is way more likely to float your boat. I might be alone here but I would so much rather be given a card like this by someone who knows that I'd care about something like this than a dvd I'll never watch, thrust into my hands accompanied the awkward phrase, "Sorry, I didn't really have a clue what to get you." Um, thanks?

Art

Art is such an underestimated gift. I think in all my 22 years I can only recall one time that I've been given art for a birthday or Christmas. If you're an artist, I really can't think of a better way of showing someone you care about them than a hand-painted work of art made especially for them. Art is subjective too, so don't worry about it being crap. Use your friend's favourite colours and motifs and try and imagine how it would fit into their home. (Note: art is a really awesome present for people that have just moved into a new space. My brilliant creative friend Jade actually has painted something as a housewarming gift for each of our friends that have bought a house or apartment this year.) If you're not very artistic or are way too lazy/swamped, buy a loved one something beautiful from Etsy! Might I suggest this gorgeous Labyrinth-inspired print from Krista Huot? Yes, I know I didn't stretch my brain far with this one; you already know I love both the Labyrinth movie and Krista Huot. Whatever, guys! Art. It's a crowd pleaser.

Spaces by Frankie mag

Since we're already on the subject of art and the home and creativity and whatnot, how about the Spaces book compiled by Frankie magazine? If someone you know is into interior design or just spying on other people's homes, this is totally for them. It's a collection of photos and stories about the interiors of all sorts of interesting and creative people. I've had a bit of a squizz at this in stores and it's a really awesome read and gave me all sorts of ideas for when I eventually move out. Oh yeah, I'm a writer and therefore I'll be living with my parents until I (or they) die. Goddamn. Anyway, if someone you know is a "Frankie-type person" and soon to fly the nest, throw this under the tree. Buy it here.

Loot from Typo

Man, seriously, as much as I despise gift cards from my immediate family and friends, I would be more than happy with a series of Typo (or JB hi fi or Borders, let's be honest) gift cards from my extended family. Because this store owns my heart, guys. Owns. My. Heart. Yeah, I know, I'm being dramatic. But seriously, there is something for everyone here. Cute pens and tiny notepads and Christmas ornaments to stuff stockings, big works of art (here she goes again...) and laptop bags, mustache kits, recipe and travel and interior design books (man, I'm not original at all, am I?) lanterns, puzzles, stationery sets... You know what would be a cute idea? To send your faraway friend a Typo goodie bag with a stationery kit and awesome Space Invaders pens and tell them that in the New Year you guys are going to get serious and become snail mail buddies. Find your nearest store here.

A Lomo Camera

Everyone likes taking photos. Everyone. I've lost count of the amount of times I've had my camera hijacked at a party, filled with obscure photos of people doing compromising things, and returned to me by an apologetic drunkard three hours later. Interestingly, some people actually like trying to take fun, decent and creative photos whilst sober and for these sort of people I would suggest a lomo camera. I got a Meg White Diana+ White Stripes limited edition camera for my birthday a couple of years ago and it pretty much made me start lizzing. (If you're not a 30 Rock fan, I refer you to urban dictionary.) If you have someone in your life that likes pretty cameras and pretty photos and old school film and is possibly even somewhat of "a hipster", perchance this is for them. Here's the Lomography Australia website.

So there's a few of my ideas. Don't forget about the K-Mart Wishing Tree appeal or other similar appeals either guys! And for the record anyone from my "real life" who may be reading this: this is not a thinly veiled present suggestion blog. Think of your own damn ideas! Though I guess I wouldn't say no to some Typo loot...or a Jack White Holga...dammit. And no, I probably won't be getting any of you anything from this list either. So there ;)

Things I Love Thursday

2010-11-11T19:31:00.004+10:00

Feminist art discussion (last night's aforementioned forum was amazing), caramel mudcake, playing my bass, Xena matches on the '64 and pasta movie nights with Jon, market stall planning and Dexter with Zoe, finding an old BUST magazine at the newsagent, the Pulp Fiction bookstore in Brisbane, social skatin' with the derby girls, renting movies, finding hilarious notes in an old school book, planning a Christmas party, daydreaming of Newcastle again (going back for the weekend before Christmas), spending my holidays holed up at uni and Borders writing articles and stories with Starbucks mocha frappucinos (and speaking of Starbucks, the fact that the seasonal gingerbread and toffee nut flavours have arrived!), browsing around the Christmas displays, drooling over a sexy bass and drum kit in Allan's, an impromptu bowling and ice cream to celebrate Jon's rad promotion, Pokemon Pearl, brainstorming over drinks for an upcoming ideas festival, stormtrooper nails.

WOM+N - Form and Function Art Exhibition

2010-11-06T18:24:00.006+10:00

Last night I had the pleasure of attending an art show put on by my university's Women's Collective. Considering I love art shows anyway, and this one promised not only an evening of feminist art but awesome conversation and free cheese and wine, you could not have kept me from The Tidy Gallery at Woolloongabba's Alchemix Studios last night. (Even though they tried - the facebook event left the "9" off the address and directed me to "2 Logan Road" instead of 29 - luckily the kind folk at the Thai restaurant located at 2 Logan Road knew where the event was anyway!)

The exhibition itself was amazing and a few pieces in particular were really thought provoking. While the more traditional paintings were all awesome, none in particular stood out (actually, there was a red and green painting in which if you stared long enough it would subvert into pink and white, which I'm sure I would have found to be a really effective artistic portrayal of gender if my eyes had actually co-oporated - I'm useless at things like that, I don't think I've ever seen the "secret image" in one of those Magic Eye pictures yet!) but the pieces that really grabbed me were both digital - the first one was a series of security camera pictures rotating in several digital photo frames. The photos were taken in one of Brisbane's brothels and it was a fascinating way of flipping the male gaze on its head. The second was a video on a loop of two women shaving each other's legs and the intimacy of such a pragmatic activity was really interesting.

Upstairs and after locating the beverage and snack tables (which I managed in about 2.9 seconds) I had the pleasure of chatting to several lovely girls who I had met through my university's Women's Room and made some new friends too, who adopted me after we finished complimenting each others' boots. I don't think I would have had half as many amazing encounters this year if it weren't for my crazy red docs, readers, I really don't. In malls I actually see people's eyes flick to them in the same way most women experience the eyes of men flicking to their breasts. (What a relevant sidenote in a post mentioning the female body and the male gaze!) After sampling the blue cheese ("It's absolutely awful, it tastes like vomit, you have to try it, off we go," new friend Nick declared as he steered me back towards the cheese platters) and admiring other new friend Nat's fuzzy knitted uterus (a piece entitled "Home" that was incredibly well crafted and hung from the ceiling in the middle of the room, allowing for an insurmountable number of jokes along the lines of "Someone's fondling Nat's vagina!") I called it a night, mainly due to the fact that I was incredibly drunk and sending Jon incoherent texts about Liz Phair. I purchased a t-shirt (which I forgot about completely when I went to pay for skate class this morning - good thing Skateaway has an ATM!) and somehow got myself onto a train. A fantastic night out!

The QUT Women's Collective in conjunction with the QUT Art Museum is hosting a corresponding forum this Wednesday the 10th of November to open discussion on the experiences of female artists.

"The panel will be facilitated by Dr Courtney Pederson with the aim of opening a discussion of women artists’ experience. In particular, the participation of the patriarchal gaze by women and the ways in which this engages or undermines how women are represented in visual culture. "

If you're in Brisbane and interested, the facebook event is here. Hope to see some of you there!

*image by Rebecca Daynes, "Self Portrait With a Pinch"

Monster Art: Inside A Black Apple

2010-10-25T23:44:00.006+10:00

Sorry for the quiet spell, readers. It's assignment city over in the Monster World at the moment and I've been very busy trying not to lose my mind. However, blogger's guilt has kicked in and I really wanted to share another of my favourite artists with you! So today I bring you Inside A Black Apple.

We all know I'm a sucker for carnivals and fairytale art so my fondness for Inside A Black Apple should be of no surprise to anyone. Inside A Black Apple is the illustrator to the loveliest dreams you've ever dreamed. Carnivals and tattoos and bears and mermaids and whistling eggs in dapper trousers all play together in her prints. Her beautiful use of colour and the perfect softness and simplicity in each print makes me dream of falling in love and running away to the circus.

If you're a fan of quirky,feminine prints, anthropomorphic creatures, bearded ladies and valeintines, I must insist you pay Inside A Black Apple a visit. And hey, why not check out all of her prints over at her etsy shop as well? If you've got a young one or a bun in the oven, you'll probably agree these whimsical and soft prints are absolutely perfect for the walls of a nursery. That being said, there's more than a few prints I'd like to snag for myself there...

Wherever I Lay My Hat

2010-10-12T23:46:00.005+10:00

So, The latest 20sb Blog Carnival has rolled around and being that I love all things blog and carnival related, I figured I'd jump on the wagon to "post the story of my "best travel adventure".

Readers, I've done a fair bit of travelling, and I honestly don't have a "best" travel adventure - not one shining example that strikes itself as obvious in my mind, anyway. Fresh on the tails of the This is Not Art/National Young Writers Festival I find myself biased and wanting to post about that, but, uh - didn't I do that two blogs ago? And how much does flying back to the town my family is from count as "travelling", anyway? Time to move on, Monster Girl.

Or perhaps, it's time to move back. Here are some rough snapshots of a few of my more memorable holidays:

Fifteen

The soundtrack to my first New Zealand holiday involved a lot of Avril Lavigne's first album lent to me by a friend, Good Charlotte's first album shamefully purchased by myself, Linkin Park's…well, one of them, I don't even remember now, and a mix cd that I bought at New Zealand's version of The Warehouse (a lot different to the Aussie Warehouse) which from memory contained the theme song to Malcolm in the Middle and the Spiderman theme song. I don't know what was going through my head, readers, I really don't know. The campervan holiday was filled with snowboarding and bungee jumping and West Highland White Terriers wearing Drizabone jackets and public campsite showers with heated floors and a milkshake best forgotten on some cafe up a windy cliff. There seemed to be some holiday celebrating lubricant going on in Queenstown, I was still young enough not to really understand fully lube and its necessities but was old enough to laugh about it with my brother. It was the dead of winter and everything was crisp and hazy.

Sixteen

I remember listening to Janet Jackson's "Love Me For A Little While" at least six times with my brother as it rolled around on the plane's pop radio station on the way to Bangkok. Who knows why we found that song so funny. In Thailand we had a room to ourself and we holed up with Gameboys and magazines, laughing over Thai MTV. A foreign city, a foreign currency and a foreign language and yet it should have been more unfamiliar than it was. Instead it felt oddly homey and comfortable in some weird way and our parents didn't mind going out for the day and telling us to feel free to roam around Bangkok's busiest districts alone. McDonalds was exactly the same and completely different. Room service spaghetti, temples, tuk tuks and bright streets that just kept going. I bought eighteen t-shirts and that was going easy. We took a plane out of the city, a longboat up the river, and an Elephant up the mountains and stayed with the locals in huts, eating rice and sleeping on the floor, bedding surrounded in mosquito nets. Six years feels like a lifetime ago and it's scary how hard it is to remember.

Nineteen Again

It was the year I decided not to turn twenty because "I didn't see the point of twenty", and "I hate even numbers." Newly liberated by my visa debit card and after managing to procure a passport and have my mother help me with the whole process without at any point cottoning on to the fact that twenty year-olds - sorry, nineteen year-olds - don't go about ordering passports without due reason, I booked myself a ticket back to New Zealand and found myself the night before having to ask for a lift to the airport. Yeah, that didn't go over well, but what can I say? I have a weird reluctance to share with the class. I didn't even tell my mum about my last serious boyfriend until I was forced to by a friend, a significant amount of time into the relationship. I sat in the airport happily texting my New Zealand friends paranoid pondering about terrorists. When I got off the plane I had a brief flutter of panic. What the hell was I doing? I'd never met these girls before in person, this is what horror stories in newspapers were about. Over a week later and I couldn't have imagined not going. Giggling in bed watching Howl's Moving Castle, sharing Mrs Fields cookies I'd smuggled over in my massive army duffel and tearing through scary cornfields being chased by actors wielding chainsaws. Ice cream out of mugs and new haircuts and tattoos and trips to the zoo and matching shirts. Freezing water at a New Zealand beach in midwinter. Mostly, though, just friends.

***

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Dear Spiderman television,

2010-10-09T19:29:00.003+10:00

Dear Spiderman television,

I'm in a bit of a low place tonight. You may have gathered from the mangled screaming coming from above you as I tossed and turned and threw pillows in my loft bed. Yeah, it's just one of those nights. But as I lay there, thinking melodramatic Plathy sorta thoughts, it occurred to me.

I may not have any pals around tonight to bring over a block of bubbly chocolate and watch comfort movies (probably Mona Lisa Smile, I can't lie to you, Spiderman television) with. I may not have anyone to tell me how to work the sound on the other TV so I can play Columns on my Sega or Xena on my sixty-four because let's face it, Spiderman television, it's not worth it without the sound, it's just not. But I have you. Just sitting around, waiting for me to clear the shit off my futon so I can curl up in front of you.

I'm so sorry, Spiderman television. I'm sorry for forgetting your cute-as-hell exterior and, it might be slightly inappropriate but yeah, your sexy AV ports. It's not your fault you're not hooked up to the pay tv box and you know, you're not choosey, Spiderman television. You're like, oh, what, that other television won't give you sound? Baby, I'm here for you. What? Other dvd players won't play your not-entirely-legal-but-goddamn-it-they've-got-the-original-soundtrack Daria dvds? Chuck 'em into my inbuilt, honey, I'm just here to please.

Spiderman television, you don't care about what's going on under my eyes or the fact that these Space Invader PJ pants haven't met up with a washing machine since before Newcastle. I could be sitting here in a ball gown and you wouldn't even notice and other girls might find that frustrating but not me, Spiderman television, I just find that a turn on.

Speaking of turn ons, how about we spend the night together, Spiderman television? You, me, and Sega Columns. I'll put some pasta on. I hope you guys like three cheeses.

xxx Monster Girl

Undressing TiNA

2010-10-06T14:33:00.006+10:00

So, I am home from Newcastle safe and sound, dear readers. Just in case any of you were worried. You weren't? Well, whatever, I'm going to bore you by rambling about my trip regardless.

Can I just say I had the most amazing time in...forever? There are a lot of things that have changed my life for the better this year, like figuring out how I like my oats, for instance. TiNA was another of those things. I honestly don't think I've had so much fun and felt so comfortable and happy all year, except possibly at Splendour. In fact, if Splendour in the Grass and the This is Not Art/National Young Writers Festival were combined, I most likely would just move to whatever town that it was held in and refuse to leave. And refuse to let anyone else leave.

Within a few hours of being at the festival on Thursday morning, I had made several amazing friends (like Alex, whose blog you should definitely check out - she writes jokes for Paul McDermott on Good News Week, guys!) and I felt so comfortable with them, like I'd known them all my life, that a few times over the course of the festival I had to restrain myself from greeting them with bear hugs or insulting them in that casual way you do with your best mates. "You've only known them five seconds, Monster Girl," I chided myself. "Don't be that Freak Girl." Luckily for me the position of Festival Freak Girl was already taken by a girl who asked a completely weird and irrelevant...and dare I say inappropriate question early on in a roundtable session. I'm just going to say that it involved child pornography and leave it right there, okay?

I won't bore you all with every miniscule detail but suffice to say that the festival included bikinis, multiple Noodle Box outings, networking, literary discussion til the cows came home, almost getting married, (well, not really, but the amount of wedding stores in Newcastle is astonishing!) getting honked at a billion times, the video Marieke Hardy's parents made for her 21st birthday party, several helpings of my aunt's amazing vegetarian lasagne, finding a store that sells gingerbread lipbalm (and of course subsequently purchasing said gingerbread lipbalm), plastic glass upon plastic glass of free champagne, a girl being hurled through the Staple Manor window whilst sewn to someone else, croissants in the park with Catcher in the Rye, a kismet meeting with a pal from uni, mars bar cheesecake, cheap bus fares, narrowly avoiding a play based on The Human Centipede, a Zine Fair with roller derby publications and vegetarian food galore, meeting my cousin's beautiful baby girl, and the kindest, most creative people you could imagine.

I am actually mildly depressed to be home. (I just bought the Xena video game for the '64 though, which I will admit helps somewhat.) This is Not Art 2011 simply cannot come soon enough.

I didn't really get my camera out much at all during the festival, but here are a few snapshots:

The Staple Manor, festival hangout

Origami cranes at the Staple Manor

Batman street art in Newcastle

New friends Alex and Tim

Happy Birthday DudeBestie!

2010-10-01T06:00:00.005+10:00

It's my dude-bestie Jon's 22nd birthday today and since he is one of this little blog's biggest supporters and one of the only people in my life who would actually read a birthday message I posted here for them, I figured I had better get on this like butterscotch sauce on hotcakes. Or something.
Jon has been one of the best friends a crazy girl like myself could ask for. He's supported me in all my weird and often stupid endeavours, talked me through tough choices and believed in me even when I didn't really believe in myself. We've come a long way since grade 6 in Mr Chandler's class, like when I taught him how to talk to girls over msn, for instance. :P
He's one of the most generous people I know, with his time and with his heart. He'll always give me a lift and never make me feel bad about it, he drew me into a few pages of a Scott Pilgrim comic a few weeks ago, he sends me awesome emails and texts me photos of Xena lookalikes in the mall and lets me rant about the same things night after night and is still my friend after all the times I've gotten drunk and shrieked into his ear, and last week he gave me a Nintendo 64, guys. For absolutely no reason other than he wanted to. Ummm....amazing.
How do I repay him? By running off to Newcastle and not even being around on his birthday or the party tomorrow night! I am awful. But I know he will forgive me, because he's awesome like that. :) I hope everyone reading this other than Jon (someone else is bound to read this, right...?) knows or will know the power of having a friend like this in your corner. It means a hell of a lot. So happy birthday, Jon! I love you and I hope your day is filled with Kristen Bell daydreams and delicious maths equations and hilarious Calvin and Hobbes comic strips.
xxx Monster Girl

I wanted to match this with a photo of us from his 21st last year but I was the size of a toothpick and was a greasy mess as I was in too much Emotional Pain to wash my hair or even smile properly, apparently. (Sorry, Jon.) Hopefully these happy snaps will suffice! :)
At a friend's Hawaiian-themed 21st in 2008. Everyone who knew me in 2008 through to mid 2009 agrees that particular beanie of mine should be burnt. I wore it, uh...a lot.

At a roller derby afterparty earlier this year. I love that Jon, who never drinks, looks smashed, and our friends are blissed out none the wiser in the background. Haha.

Last month. Yes, I'm wearing a grandpa cardigan at a bar. I shouldn't be allowed to dress myself on nights out. Really.

What's in the Monster Bag: NYWF Edition

2010-09-28T23:49:00.005+10:00

As I'm sure many of you jet-setters have experienced, packing a suitcase is itself a fine art. However, Monster Friends, I am but a student and tomorrow I am travelling to Newcastle on special "light saver" plane tickets, which basically means you're allowed carry-on luggage and that's it. Since I plan to take my macbook Veronica as well as my carry-on backpack I anticipate a fight at the airport but I'll just play dumb. After all, my luggage won't be adding up to over 10kgs, which is the limit...yeah. My argument sounds weak to me, too.

Anyway, how do I plan on getting around this luggage shortage? By pulling out all my tricks and turning this art of packing into something you need a Masters degree in.

This is what I'll be taking in my small backpack:

5 t-shirts (I'll wear my jeans and a cardigan down and just alternate shirts each day)
a skirt and some tights (you never know)
space invaders PJ pants
undies (fairly important)
toiletry bag (also fairly important)
Nintendo DS Lite (of course)
a book
my journal
my camera
a small soft bag for my day-to-day needs in Newcastle
various chargers
various beanie/berets.

And in my macbook bag I'm taking:

Veronica the mac (duh)
a copy of Yen magazine
my wallet
a chocolate bar for the plane
my iPod
a writing pad and pen
a map of Newcastle
a printed off program of the NYWF events I want to attend.

...I know. If I get away with this I'll be a miracle worker. Wish me luck, Monster Pals!

National Young Writers Festival, Sep 30 - Oct 4

2010-09-22T20:58:00.005+10:00

So, this time a week from now I will most likely be flopped on my aunt and uncle's spare bed in Newcastle, warm-bellied after dinner at my Grandma's and tired after a long flight, reminiscing of the summer I spent sprawled out in the exact same spot, feeling guilty for how I long I was spending on the phone to my high school boyfriend and writing him the longest letter known to man (an in-joke in reference to a F.R.I.E.N.D.S episode, our favourite show. At the time, yes, I did insist upon writing Friends that way. I know, but shut up, I was sixteen.)

Now, six years on (holy f*ck) I'm a writer in a much different capacity. I'm a writing student, I get paid to write articles, albeit awful ones, for money, albeit not a lot of it. I just registered myself as a professional artist in a writing capacity in the eyes of the law and I even have a totally legit and sensible email address just for my freelance work. The days of scribbling nonsense and corny jokes about Ross and Rachel are...well, okay, probably not gone forever, but I've come a long way, at least I'd like to think.

So why will I be in Newcastle? I'll be in town for the National Young Writers Festival! NYWF is a five day event filled with writing workshops, book readings, author panels, zine development, and all sorts of other yummy delights. There are event panels discussing blogging guys! As bloggers most of us call ourselves writers in some capacity anyway so chances are there might be a few of you who'd be interested in something like this - in which case, I thoroughly recommend (as resident writers festival groupie) that you get your ass to the jetstar website and buy yourself some flights. All the events - panels, tours, workshops, reading, everything - are completely free so if you have someone to put you up and a bit of pocket money for flights, come! Seriously, jetstar is cheap as anything nowadays. If you do end up hitting the festival then please, email me (at my less "professional" email address monstergirlemails@gmail.com ) and we'll meet up, grab a coffee and discuss literature together! Y'know, if you wanna meet me and all...

Now, for my five festival picks!

1. The Salinger book club

Want to sit around in a park with a bunch of strangers talking about how much of a tool Holden is and why Franny and Zooey are the shit? Hey, me too! Friday, 11am

2. Op Shop Tour of Newie

Not sure what thrifting has to do with writing but what do I care? Wandering around all the local St. Vinnies with a bunch of likeminded lit nerds - does it get much better? Friday, 1pm

3. Women of Letters, Writers Festival Edition

Okay. I've gushed about my beloved Women of Letters events here on this blog enough. You get it. The NYWF topic is "A letter to the photo I wish had never been taken," and can I just say I've got plenty of those? (I wonder if previously-mentioned high school boyfriend still has the one that pops into my mind first, I never was successful in deleting it off his computer. OH GOD GUYS NOTHING SUSS, it was just a particularly round-and-red-faced photo of me reclining on the couch in all my pimply, greasy-haired glory.) Friday, 7pm

4. The Zine Fair @ King Street

Zines -- a bumbling young writer's haven. This zine fair is apparently going to be a giant market area with music and food stalls as well. Did somebody mention food? Okay, I'm in. Sunday, 11am

5. The "I Should Have Read That By Now" panel with Benjamin Law

I like Benjamin Law (I actually didn't go to something he was hosting last night because I had been to three of his events in the past two weeks and was scared he'd start noticing me as "that weird stalker chick." But in my defence, it's not my fault he happens to guest lecture at my university is it? No, it is not.) and there are plenty of classics I haven't read yet, so I'm looking forward to this one! Sunday, 1pm

Are any of you as writers-festival nerdy as I am? Got any favourite authors you'd love to see in a panel? Tell me about it, studs!

Hope to see some of you there, Monster Writers! x

Happy Birthday Blog! (and filling in the blanks)

2010-09-17T19:26:00.001+10:00

Oh hello there! It just so happens to be this little blog's 2nd birthday today! I have nothing substantial to say about that other than thank for for plodding along with me, guys! Because I can't think of much to say lately, I'm participating in this week's Fill In The Blanks Friday, The questions are over at The Little Things We Do. Here are my riveting answers...

1. When I get a day to myself I like to __Play my bass, knit, blog, read, watch godawful television, organise something with Zoe, play video games, dance around my room to horrible music, etc.

2. High school was.... Fine. A place to hang out all day with your friends, really.

3. A little dream I have is to get our girl band off the ground, haha. And by "get off the ground" I mean...I don't know...learn...how...to...play...and...stuff...

4. A big dream I have is save enough to take off to Tokyo with my dude-bestie Jon for my 23rd birthday next year :)

5. If I could drive any car my pick would be A VW van so that I'd never have to worry about homelessness, haha. Or just something tiny and vintage and green that I can chuck all my shit in and not have to worry about getting cheese stains on the seats.

6. A time that I felt really and truly beautiful was I don't think there's any sort of past "time" for me at least - I feel like this a lot, when I am happy. When I'm wearing something I love, when a boy looks at me like ~that~, when I sleep on my face and wake up with Angelina Jolie lips, haha. Not saying I feel beautiful 24/7, but yeah.

7. Tomorrow I will.... go to skate class in the morning, hopefully get some work done, then go out to a movie night in the evening at a friend's house.

"Pick up" Six

2010-09-14T18:39:00.007+10:00

"Hello, readers!" Monster Girl says sheepishly returning after a shameful little period of neglect. I simply for the life of me haven't had any bloggy inspiration, and hate to settle for mediocrity and lists the way I always do in such fixes. This is all I, a penniless sitar player, can off you at the moment, my lovely courtesans. (Um, so yeah...I've seen Moulin Rouge...a lot...) I saw this link on Here Comes The Sun - six of my current "top picks" - and thought it seemed like a fun idea to use as a "pick me up"!
Here are my 6 picks:

1. Lipton Red Ice Tea. It's meant to have guarana in it, and even though I checked out the ingredients and it has like 0.02% guarana, I still like to pretend it's a healthier way to get my energy fix during the day. That, and it's yummy.2. I bought Dad the first series of Doctor Who for Fathers Day (Father's Day? Fathers' Day?) and my Mum, Dad and I have been geeking out every night working out way through it.

3. The Beach, by Alex Garland. My BFF Zoe lent this to me a few weeks ago when I wanted something to read, describing it as, "Awesome, but just so you're prepared, it gets Lord of The Flies-f*cked." and it totally does. It's crazy! Like, only in the last bit of the book too, so it's a bit of a mind trip. But it's amazing. It makes me want to go back to Thailand - and never, ever go back to Thailand at the same exact time.4. My bass guitar. Granted, this particular one isn't my bass guitar, but it certainly is a pretty one, which I think should count for something!

5. Japanese vegetarian omelette rolls from LR Sushi on Adelaide street in Brisbane. Everyone in the entire city flocks to this place come lunchtime and I was always sceptical - I love me some sushi, but isn't all sushi just sushi? No. All sushi is not all sushi. And this sushi is superb.6. I got French Kissers out from the video store and it was great! Really sexual (as you'd expect a french film about teenagers to be, I guess) but - spoiler alert - no actual sex! Weird. However, it was lovely and I thoroughly recommend it.

Ya'll should participate as well - and throw me some ideas for posts, will you? Send some mojo my way! If any of you would like to do a guest post as well, drop me a line.

Australia as a Women's Space

2010-09-02T12:05:00.006+10:00

"Who cares if the prime minister is male or female? It's not like all of the last ones were voted in just for being men. I hope women don't vote in Gillard just because she's a woman," many Australians were echoing only two weeks ago. (You know, back when Australia actually had a government and thought that the voting process would keep such shenanigans as democracy alive and kicking.)

"Why do girls always go on about what they don't have? They can vote, they can work, whatever. Get over it, you're not disadvantaged anymore."

"Why do we need a women's space at uni?" A male friend once asked. "There's no men's space." ("The rest of the world is the men's space," another astute male friend answered.)

This morning in the car, a news report came through on the radio and caught my attention. Women now officially make up 10% of the leaders of Australia's top businesses, a "landmark level"! This comes as a woman, Sam Mostyn became appointed to the board of Virgin Blue. The Australian Institute of Company Directors couldn't be prouder of themselves.

Ten percent. That right there, readers, is the answer to those questions.

"Why do women want more?" "Why does it matter if all the Prime Ministers are men?" "Why do we need a women's space?" If you're educated in gender studies and/or consider yourself a feminist (that includes men, please note) these questions might initially seem ignorant, but let's be clear: it's not as though these questions are unreasonable for average people to ask. It's hard for us as Australians, living in such a beautiful and fortunate country to remember that we don't actually all have the world at our fingertips, at least not in the way that we've been brought up to believe.

Growing up as Australian Gen Y girls, our mothers went to work every day the same as Dad did. Our fathers often did the cooking and a lot of our Aussie Mums weren't afraid to bash around a spider or scare off a snake. Our school captains were girls, the best all around athlete in school was female, picking up blue ribbons at swimming and althetics carnivals, as well as cross-country. Our teachers were women, who left work pregnant and came back to work six months later with both baby and career alive and healthy. We could apply for any course out there as we finished school and got ready for uni, often kicking the asses of our best male friends in the final exams. And, yes, we saw in our first female prime minister.

Fact: Australia has never voted in a woman as Prime Minister. We've had 27 Prime Ministers since our first in 1901. Sri Lanka elected the first woman Prime Minister in 1960, before the feminist movement began. Argentina elected a female president in 1974. Ireland has had a female president for thirteen years.

At the end of the day, a woman can do anything she want, but she's going to be paid less than a man doing the same job. Almost being equal shouldn't be good enough for anyone in our country. Almost having the same rights and opportunities is not good enough for anyone. That goes for any person, regardless of gender or any other factor.

I post this musing little rant-of-sorts snuggled up on the couch in my university's women's room, to the sound of my fellow females chatting away, clinking around with mugs and teabags at the kettle, listening to their iPods and studying as they rustle around in beanbags. Right now this room might be our women's space, but I remain optimistic that eventually "the rest of the world" will be space enough for everyone.

Welcome to Spring, Australia.

Monster Vegetarian: Kuan Yin Tea House

2010-08-30T21:38:00.007+10:00

Hello hungry Monster Friends! Something I've always wanted to do here on Monster Girl Writes is to showcase the best my little town of Brisbane has to offer, as well as review the various vegetarian places in town. Finally I'm getting around to it! Early last year The Necronaut took me to a place in Fortitude Valley that I'd always wanted to try and I loved it, and last Friday I dragged a somewhat hesitant Zoe (The BFF Unit) back for another round.

Kuan Yin Tea House

The tea house is an interesting asian food joint, serving only vegetarian food. The twist is that the majority of the items on the menu are "meat", so that when you're ordering, you have to order the "pork rice", which is rather an unsettling experience for a girl who has been vegetarian for close to a decade. Our drinks - a Strawberry Green Tea for Zoe and a Smith Apple frappe for Monster Moi - came out first and can I just say I am now in love with apple frappes? Pretty sure I ordered something boring like orange juice last time I was at the Tea House, and was extremely happy I branched out. I had a sip of Zoe's drink too and it was also rather lovely. Next we were brought a plate of sweet potato wedges, which we picked up carefully and eyed tentatively before chewing into. Strangest. Taste combination. Ever. Have you ever had a deep fried Mars Bar, readers? The wedges were battered, and the outside was a crispy and delicious, sweet and cinnamony flavour, and combined with the sweet potato insides neither of us could really figure out what was going on in our mouths. I was definitely a fan, though.

Unfortunately the wedges were extremely filling and taste-dominating so they were mostly left forgotten as the actual meals came and we stepped bravely into the scary world of Fake Meat Lumps. Zoe fearfully announced that her "chicken" had the exact same texture as actual chicken, and my "pork" was actually pink inside. I don't want to know how they do it, Monster Readers, I really do not, but neither chicken nor pork tasted much like actual chicken or pork so we're relatively certain it's not all a hoax. Anyway, my "meat" was delicious and the veggies were great too. I think we both walked out of the tea house vague about our feelings involving the meal we'd just had, but certain it'd been a culinary success in some sense overall. Just writing this up makes me want to be back there again at table number five, chewing on something confusing but without doubt delicious.

My "pork and chicken" combo, Smith Apple frappe and our sweet potato wedges. Yum!

Monster Girl's Veggie Verdict:

I'd go back (again), but it's definitely more of a novelty for me, I'll admit. A very reasonably priced (around $9 for a meal, $3.50 for drinks) and yummy novelty. I guess it's the sense of fuzziness that surrounds the whole experience that makes the place somewhere I wouldn't regularly frequent: both times I've walked out going, "Did I like that? I really liked that, right?" Even during the meal I was sort of feeling the same way. I give Kuan Yin Tea House three teapots!

The Carnivore's Candid Opinion:

"I think all the veggies tasted the same, like they'd had a huge amount of the same seasoning spilt all over them, and I think the rice was a little crappy. Strangely the fake meat was the favourite part of the meal. I, being a serious carnivore, was incredibly (that's putting it lightly) nervous about the idea of fake meat. I'm not entirely sure if the fake chicken actually tasted a whole lot like chicken, but I do know it was quite yummy. The drinks were really nice, I'm certain I liked those. The overall impression of the veggie Tea House was one of...confusion. The meal was fair, but I couldn't tell you why the good parts were good. They just were. I give Kuan Yin Tea House two and a half rubick's cubes out of 5!" - Zoe

The Kuan Yin Tea House is located at 198 Wickham Street, Fortitude Valley, Brisbane.

Monster Girl Gaming: Harvest Moon

2010-08-24T21:45:00.005+10:00

Hey Monster Friends! It's time for another round of Monster Girl Gaming! If you're new here, (or just forgot because it's been a while) the point of my Monster Girl Gaming segments is to try open up the world of video games to women in the blogging universe, by reviewing games that are accessible to girls if not marketed directly to them, but also games that offer substance and content that stereotypical "girl games" often don't provide - games that involve more than dressing up your character and solving the latest fashion crime. (Though at the same time, I'm not here to denounce or pass judgement on those sort of games, either.) Here's the latest instalment:
Harvest Moon: Tree of Tranquility for Wii

The Gist
Harvest Moon is a Japanese anime-style farming game series in which you run a farm and have to sell crops and produce, keep your livestock healthy and happy, and find yourself a husband or wife and have children if you're into that sort of thing. It sounds ridiculously simple and it is, but it is also somehow eerily addictive - whether it's the cute graphics, the passing of time, the goals that you achieve at a slow pace. There are some fantasy-style elements, such as sprites, that add to the quaint style of the games.
Why it Rocks
The game rocks because it's the sort of escapism perfect to spend a couple of spare hours on every once in a while, the sort of friendly game that just makes you feel good. Earning "hearts" when you make friends with characters, finding new recipes and experimenting in your kitchen, growing potatoes - the simplicity is soothing and engrossing without being the sort of life simulation game that detracts from your real life, which so many can be.
Who Should Play?
If you're a fan of the Animal Crossing series, which is a bit more well known than the Harvest Moon series and which I will probably eventually review here as well, then I think you'd be into Harvest Moon. It's an engrossing "big picture" simulation game that would appeal to players of The Sims, but also goal-oriented enough to appeal to people that like more focus in their games. It's the perfect game to come home to and unwind with after a tough day while sipping a cup of tea, but it's not as immediately goal-focused and mentally demanding as something addictive like World of Warcraft, for example, so there's less commitment involved. My brother likes it too, so it's not just for girls at all!
In Other Nerdy News...
Harvest Moon games are also available on DS and gamecube, as well as older platforms. There's also the spinoff series, Rune Factory, that is definitely worth checking out. The new Wii game, Harvest Moon: Animal Parade, which is basically a circus update to Tree of Tranquility and is out in Japan already, will be out eventually in the Western world and it looks to be even more awesome, with lots of features added to the game, so keep an eye out for that one! x

What games are you into at the moment, Monsters?

Things I Love Thursday

2010-08-19T10:59:00.006+10:00

buying cupcakes to support the RSPCA's Cupcake Day, drawing, writing up a graphic novel, macaroni and cheese, shopping dates, Daria sleepovers and girl band and market stall plans with Zoe, the electric bass guitar The Necronaut gave me, skate class and derby double headers, lovely emails from bloggers, all of my writing classes, my friend Jon, records, snuggly socks, the hoard of fifteen year old girls who ran up to me and told me I was the coolest girl they'd ever seen, vanilla mochas with marshmallows at the local coffee shop, bells on my wrists, sushi, dancing around my room to Kate Miller-Heidke's Curiouser and Curiouser album on full blast, how cute I look in my Splendour Insight ringer tee, stationery, interior decorating, Brisbane's West End, hugs, chinese crested x teacup chihuahua puppies, getting to write about the election and feminism for work as opposed to Lady Gaga for a change, silly train conductors, Rolling Stone magazine, Mars Bars, finding gluten free penne so I can make my speciality pasta for a special mister, writing in my journal, watching Doctor Who with the parentals, in-depth and heated Star Wars discussions with my nerd boys and sharing favourite conspiracy theories with a new friend, the coffee place on the corner of the Creative Industries precint at my art school that do mochas for a lot cheaper, including complimentary flavour shots and cookies! x

Girls Who Rock (and Sometimes Roll)

2010-08-16T11:21:00.012+10:00

Last year, in Triple J's Hottest 100 of All Time (Triple J is a national radio station that runs an annual Hottest 100 songs list that the nation votes on, for those of you non-Aussies) I couldn't help but notice how few of the acts were women. Recently at Splendour in the Grass, I observed that the majority of the women acts were delegated to a smaller tent while the main stage was mostly dominated by the guys the entire weekend. "Thank you guys for all of your support, keep it coming because I want to play in the Ampitheatre next year!" Clare Bowditch bellowed as she left the stage at Splendour. Damn right! I thought in honour of all the amazing female acts out there who are kicking ass and still coming off second in the eternal gender divide, I'd compile a list of my personal favourite female-fronted music for you all. Some of the bands have or had guys in them as well but I'm not going to be too much of a feminazi about this :) I hope you'll get involved here and leave a comment with your own favourites, or your own thoughts on this issue.

Awesome Lady Music, not listed in order of preference:

Janis Joplin
Laura Marling
Regina Spektor
Patti Smith
The Long Blondes
Ida Maria
She & Him
The Like
Sleater-Kinney
Brody Dalle
Emmy the Great
Dash & Will
Garfunkel and Oates
Magic Dirt
Hole
PJ Harvey
Joan Jett
Blondie
The Kills
Eisley
Garbage
Pat Benatar

The Like

Patti Smith

Eisley
The floor is now yours, Monster Girls and Girl-friendly Boys! Favourite chick performers? Don't agree that girls are underrepresented? Hit me with your best shot, come on and hit me with your best shot, fire away!

Scott Pilgrim vs. Monster Girl

2010-08-10T13:20:00.006+10:00

So last night I was lucky enough to score some free tickets to the exclusive screening of the Scott Pilgrim movie that gets released in cinemas later this week. When I say exclusive, I mean I wandered into my local comics store and went, "Hey guys! Scott Pilgrim?" and they were all, "Sure!" and handed me a ticket and then I was like "Um so do you think my brother would like this giant Murloc plushie from World of Warcraft for his birthday which is sort of today?" and they were like "Obviously" and I said "Do you think he would like it if I bought him a bunch of Birds of Prey comics instead?" and they were like "For you?" and I said "Okay fine I'll just take the damn plushie Murloc thing okay?!"
So, very exclusive. Anyway the movie was absolutely wonderful and I thought I'd try some sort of review here, feeling obligated to share my knowledge of the as-of-yet-unreleased film with you all.
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
"Scott Pilgrim vs. the World is an upcoming film based on the comic book series Scott Pilgrim by Bryan Lee O'Malley. The film is about Scott Pilgrim (Michael Cera) meeting the girl of his dreams, Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead). In order to win Ramona over, Scott learns that he must battle Ramona's seven evil exes, who are coming to kill him."- Wikipedia
It's definitely a different vibe from the graphic novels, which I highly recommend even to girls that don't consider themselves "comic people" - Scott Pilgrim may have some fights, but mostly in my opinion it's just a witty story about relationships. The movie took the black and white comics and turned them into something completely different, in a fantastic way. The movie was an explosion of colour and sound, and hilarious in a way very typical of Michael Cera movies - his offbeat delivery of lines had the cinema rolling in their seats. Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who I've long harboured a girl-crush on, was as fabulous and gorgeous as ever, though her last hair change (green) kind of grossed me out, to be honest. You *know* her hair's a wig throughout the movie but the green really, really looked like a wig.
The film's drawing point was without a doubt its humour. If it hadn't succeeded in being as funny as it was, it would have been a complete write-off, but luckily it hit the funny bones (interestingly, in a completely different way than the comics do, in my opinion) and I'd consider it a massive success. It was awesome. It had a strong video game vibe and lots of great pop culture references, and we all know Monster Girl eats that sort of nonsense right up and licks the plate clean.
I would suggest the movie works best as a companion to the books - the plot was sort of rushed, a lot of backstory was left out, some stuff was changed around a bit, the characters were obviously a lot less fleshed out, and to be honest some of the heart was definitely missing. (For those of you who go to see it and haven't read the comics, rest assured she's much more into him in the books!) However, the movie did what the books couldn't, and worked alongside them to show us the bright, colourful and loud world that we can only appreciate in theory on paper. I think readers would without a doubt get more out of the Scott Pilgrim world by watching the movie, just like people who love the film will get more out of it by then going and checking out the comics.
I'm going to give this one an 8/10 - it lost points for lack of heart. Probably could have split it up into two films and developed the characters, but I left the cinemas smiling and buzzed and I guess that's good enough at the end of the day. Nothing is perfect and I don't want to be too cynical here. :)
Go see it if:You like Kickass, Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, Hot Fuzz and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (and secretly went to see that kids movie Sky High even though you were probably way too old for that shit)
Finally, on the Scott Pilgrim movie website at the moment there's an avatar creator up so you can make yourselves into a Scott Pilgrim character in the style of the graphic novels! Mine's below, and here's the link so that you can make one for yourself, as long as you promise to share the link to yours here in the comments! - just select "link" in the share options in the creator once you're done :)

Happy 21st, little brother!

2010-08-04T08:17:00.004+10:00

My younger brother turns 21 today, which is kind of crazy and makes me feel way too old. Even though he doesn't read my blog (that I know of) and wouldn't care for my sentimental tripe anyway, you'll all have to excuse me for a moment while I use my little corner of the net to get a little mushy.

Okay, moment's over. Here instead are twenty one little anecdotes from our childhood:

When we saved our pocket money for forever and pooled it and bought ourselves a GameCube together on the day they were released
How we'd eat our dinner on the floor of our playroom watching Hercules
How we convinced our Mum to get us Digimon instead of easter eggs for easter and then she got us easter eggs as well and it was the best thing ever
When the new Harry Potter books would come out and I'd steal them to read them first even though my brother was the one who actually bought them
Eating 2-minute noodles raw, sprinkling the flavouring over the top
Banding together and playing playstation in various "piglet pens" at HOG (Harley Owners Group) bike rallies all over the country as we were abandoned in there by our parents
How I used to make us dress up like twins, wearing these dorky knitted yellow lion jumpers and jeans
When my brother and I would have conferences with all our plush toys and arrange them all in his bedroom and call the roll
Going on epic all-day bike rides
That time my brother decided to ride his bike down a crazy hill and ended up in hospital
That time we put my brother on the trampoline with a barrel and he almost ended up in hospital
That time the entire marble breakfast bar fell off onto my brother and he ended up in hospital
That time my brother put a pitchfork through his foot and he ended up in hospital
When my brother was afraid of ghosts or when my parents went through a rough patch so I would sneak into his room and play music or tell him stories and climb under his bed to prove there weren't any monsters there and give all the dinosaurs on his flannel sheets (which are my sheets now!) names
Our epic playtimes where we'd pretend to be characters from Sonic
When we'd get a new video game and sit there together finishing it and supporting each other until it was finished and it was the most important thing in the entire universe
Going with our grandma to Tops, the amusement park that used to be at the top of Brisbane's Myer Centre in the mall (torn down now unfortunately)
How he managed to convince my mum with his dorky sense of humour that I was doing drugs at school - he did this every week and Mum never seemed to be able to completely tell whether or not he was joking
the Simpsons Soup Incident (turns out trying to get my brother to eat soup is more complicated than giving it to him out of a Simpsons can with little Homer and Bart shaped bits floating in it)
Teasing him about girls
Always managing to convince him to let me have the top bunk on holiday

Love you G! Hope you have a rockin' birthday!

Meanwhile, in the early nineties, two half-dutch children seem to be frolicking in a field of tulips...

Splendour Wrap-Up

2010-08-03T15:25:00.003+10:00

Hello bloggers! Sorry for the wee bit of neglect, I tried to line up a guest but it didn't really work out. My bad! Splendour was absolutely amazing and so much more than I was expecting.
Pixies, Clare Bowditch, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, Band of Skulls, Angus and Julia Stone, (Julia did an amazing cover of You're The One That I Want from Grease) Laura Marling, Oh Mercy, Florence, Mumford and Sons, the Strokes, Lisa Mitchell, Washington, Whitley. Easy Mac and brownies for dinner every night and poptarts and vodka for breakfast every morning. An Alice in Wonderland sand sculpture, performance art, More vegetarian food than meat, so many people packed onto a hill we weren't allowed to sit down, morning yoga workshops, tarot card readings, henna tattoos, faces in trees, bohemian coffee tent gigs and vanilla mochas in biodegradable cups, shopping "districts" with Star Wars and Doctor Who tees and thrift stores galore, a Women of Letters literary forum with Marieke Hardy and Michaela McGuire, comedy shows, meeting Sam Cutler (author and the ex-tour manager for the Rolling Stones).
A few happy snaps:

Regular programming will resume once I've recovered - there may be a sappy personal post tomorrow though, so forgive me for that. Love ya'll!

Concerning Chemistry

2010-07-28T20:01:00.005+10:00

Readers, hopefully you'll be on the same page (or tab, whatever you cyberfiends wanna call it) with me here when I confess to you that there are certain attributes a potential suitor - or any old joe or jane doe on the street - might have that would make you interested when you wouldn't have looked twice at them otherwise. I'm not talking about things like nice hair or eyes here. If you see a guy and think, "mmm, I love dark hair on a boy" (which for the record I totally do) then I'd say that's pretty normal. I'm talking about when you sit next to a guy in your scriptwriting lecture and eye him off out of the corner of your eye because there's a copy of the Star Wars: A New Hope script on his desk. And then you see his glasses and think, "oh yeah, I could get behind this," and then you mentally slap yourself because physically slapping yourself in a crowded lecture room would be batshit crazy and also because you know if it wasn't for this shallow shared appreciation of George Lucas and the 'Wars then you would be listening to your lecturer explain the reason you're all watching I Am Legend right now and not trying to get a better glimpse of Star Wars Script Guy's face while simultaneously eyeing off Muscular Macbook Guy's bod across the room and thinking about how if you guys got together and moved in you could get an iMac desktop for your little family and that would be pretty hot.

And of course when I say you I of course mean me because you'll all probably a lot more saner than I am. But do you know what I mean? I'd like to think it's not just me and everyone has these little "drawing cards" that make them consider someone they normally wouldn't. Like a particular band shirt, a little badge or patch on their bag, novelty socks. Like even someone plain-looking and not at all your type might be worth at least a conversation because you're pretty sure you just heard them reference your favourite TV show. What sort of things draw you in, readers?

If you understood anything I wrote in this post you're a bit of a champion - I'm a bit preoccupied with getting ready for Splendour in the Grass, I just dumped my stuff off at my friend Dave's house and had to assure him that yes, I do need a giant army bag for such a short trip and not to worry because it's only that heavy because vodka bottles are heavy, okay? - but I just wanted to blog, I guess. I might have a guest post or two coming your way while I'm away dancing to The Pixies, so play nice with the substitutes while I'm away, dear Readers. Love you!

Splendour in the Grass

2010-07-23T23:38:00.014+10:00

This time next week, I will be in a mosh pit dancing away to Clare Bowditch at Splendour in the Grass. For those of you in the states, Splendour in the Grass is a winter music festival here down under, one of our biggest. Splendour is taking up a lot of my brainwaves at the moment so I thought what better to blog about? This list is brought to you in honour of 2010 and Splendour's tenth anniversary by the number 10, and also by the letter M (because it just worked out that way and apparently my blog is basically just Sesame Street.)

The Splendour of Splendour: Ten Things I'm Psyched For at Splendour Oh Ten

1. Morning Yoga

One of the loveliest things about Splendour is how much they have going on away from the main stages. Practising yoga each morning with a bunch of other eager-and-somewhat-bleary-eyed punters who have managed to crawl out of their sleeping bags is my weird idea of awesome. I'm not actually sure if I'll be able to convince someone to come with me each morning - or if I'll be able to convince myself. However I remain optimistic!

2. Marieke Hardy and Women of Letters

I'm so excited for this one; it's a literary event about the lost art of letter-writing, hosted by Marieke Hardy of Frankie, and involving lots of Splendour musicians. If you're in Melbourne, keep an eye on coming events here and head to one of these forums!

3. Meeting friends and making friends

People travel from all over Australia for Splendour (I am quite lucky it's so close to where I live, actually) and this year I get to meet a few net friends out there I haven't had the pleasure of meeting in person before, so that's pretty exciting. Also, I've always found that people at music festivals are freakishly friendly, so I'm looking forward to making new buddies and hanging out with old ones for three or four days!

4. Mysterious and kismet accommodation

The original plan was to snag some camping tickets but they sold out just as we managed to get into the online ticketing site after a lot of hassle I won't get into. Luckily one of my friends discovered their aunt's boyfriend actually owns property in Woodford, close-ish to the festival site! I haven't been up there, I have no idea what the facilities are like, and keep hearing things like "you may get lost forever coming home if you forget to leave a light on at night" and "you'll have to scare away the horses with a stick", and I'm quite curious to see what the shed we're staying in will be like and how much of a walk to Splendour each morning it actually is!

5. My sleeping bag

Okay, so there was a bit of a situation last year that possibly ran into early this year...let's just say there were several months when I slept in my sleeping bag every night as opposed to in actual sheets. Yes, I'm disgusting. It was a serious funk. Anyway I eventually emerged from my cocoon, more of a moth than a butterfly but there was definite emergence, and I threw that thing in the cupboard and never looked back, thanking my lucky stars I don't have a sense of smell. Now it's time to pull my old friend out of retirement and cross my fingers I don't regress. I wuv my cosy sleeping bag! :)

6. Mi Goreng

As I said, I'm not actually positive what facilities I'll have available, but I have been told there will be some form of a kitchen which means if all else fails there will be hot water available, so I'm packing lots of food in cans and packets of mi goreng. Festival food in general I'm psyched for - it might not be anything special and it's always crazily expensive, but there is something about festival food that makes it more delicious. My favourite thing I've ever eaten at a music festival was this prawn roll, back at thirteen or fourteen before I was a vegetarian. Nowadays I get my jollies from the lemonade, fries, cookies and stuffed spuds.

7. Mini-vacation

It seems a bit ridiculous because I've only just gone back to uni for the semester, and is a music festival really anything like a vacation anyway? Short answer: yes. To me, anyway. If I ever get married, expect my honeymoon to be somewhere crazy busy and scheduled around something like Comic-Con or Star Wars weekends - maybe it's because I live in Queensland, but the thought of going somewhere just to lounge on a beach bores me. A lot of my family vacations growing up involved army sleeping bags and crappy accommodation and long car trips and crowded campgrounds and cafeteria-style food so a music festival just screams "holiday!" to me.

8. Splendour's Very Small Mall markets and merch

Because I've been saving like a fiend lately and I'll be darned if I'm coming out of this without an overpriced t-shirt! Band and festival shirts; my one weakness. Okay, fine, one of many weaknesses.

9. Makin' memories

I've been wanting to go to Splendour for several years, making plans with friends, even getting so far as buying tickets one year to have the system fail and the organisers offer myself and a friend first go in the second round of tickets - however by that stage my friend's plans had fallen through. I'm so excited to finally be heading to Splendour, for their first year at Woodford and their tenth anniversary!

10. Music

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club! Lisa Mitchell! Laura Marling! Florence and the Machine! Washington! Little Red! Scissor Sisters! Angus and Julia Stone! Most importantly, The Pixies! To say I'm excited is somewhat of an understatement.

Are any of you guys going to Splendour this year, readers? If so we should totally meet up! You can come with me to early morning yoga! Or you can, y'know, sleep in...I won't hold it against you ;) Anyone else been to Splendour before or just consider yourself a festival expert with tips you can share? Let's spread the Splendour love!

Things I Love Thursday

2010-07-15T21:25:00.002+10:00

skate class and roller skating around the house, tickets to exciting events, cute emails and scary hilarious phone calls, screaming "POO BABIES" so loudly into my friend's ear he fell into the bathtub, secret vodka stashes, Joan Jett's "Shout", baking a Death Star cake, licking the bowl clean and getting batter in my hair, travel daydreams, movie dates and rickshaw adventures, Marie Antoinette, cuddles on the couch watching Miffy with two very cute little ones, picking out birthday presents, mocha java chip frappuccinos, texting back and forth with the bestie, doing up an invoice for my writing gig, American Graffiti, cluedo, my friend Sarah's back massages, improving my GPA, my Mum randomly giving me money to put on my go card, my brother getting Warcraft 3 so I can try it out and maybe play it with my friends, sparklers, running into friends at the shops, Typo, setting mana bar and monopoly and tea friend dates, my space invaders jim-jams, managing to save money for once, fuzzy clean flannelette dinosaur sheets, the bestie's mum making kickass veggie pasta for dinner, the Lifestyle channel, West End, silly Dariaesque crushes, Splendour in the Grass approaching.

"I am a pretty little dutch girl"

2010-07-11T23:15:00.004+10:00

In honour of the Netherlands/Spain World Cup game that kicks off in a few hours or so, I thought I would list a few of my favourite things about being (half) dutch. Okay, fine, I have blogging block. You caught me.

Why Being Dutch is Clearly The Way To Go

I love how there's not just one word for the country. Holland, The Netherlands, and their people and language are Dutch...way to be vague namewhores, guys.
I can get a European passport. That's pretty darn cool, right?
My family tree basically consists of the same five names in various orders.
The dutch use bikes more than cars. I wish I could ride my bike to uni or the shops!
Almost all Dutch people can skate. I guess roller derby is in my blood? Haha.
The dutch spread chocolate on their bread for breakfast. Heck yes!
The Dutch are the second-biggest coffee drinkers in the entire world.
Holland has more museums than any other country, ever. Including the largest collection of Van Gogh paintings.
"Hollanders" usually always have a vase of flowers in their living rooms.
Potatoes and cheese are the staples of most Dutch recipes. These are like my two favourite food items!
Crazy-ass dutch liquorice. I took my friends with me one time when I was picking some up for my mum and they're like, "Um? What's with all the cats? Why is it salty? Coins? Fish? Huh?"
This dutch chocolate vodka. Wish I had some right now to celebrate the game in style.
This dutch blog I already mentioned in my award post. Everything about it is gorgeous.

and, finally,

I have someone to root for when Australia gets kicked out of the World Cup!

Here are some things that came up in a polyvore search :) And for more Holland fun facts, you could start here.

Dear Best Friend

2010-07-07T00:01:00.000+10:00

Dear New Best Friend,

It's your birthday today so I thought I would write a blog about how much I love that you're in my life now.

I love how creative you are and how you make me laugh. I love that you have a big appetite as well and that you bake pies and how awesome your family is and your dress sense and that we like all the same stores and that we have the same favourite type of PopTarts. I like how when the big iconic lines come up in Star Wars we giggle together and that I have someone to link awesome random wedding shit and crazy nail art like those Toy Story alien nails. Adorable.

In some ways I feel like this is a new relationship. I've bounced around happily after conversations with you, happy this pretty and awesome girl wanted to talk to me. I've told others with an air of sheer glee, "She actually likes me back!" I've been a bit shy around you sometimes. I've fantasised about our bestie-future. I've given you a coveted spot in my imaginary bridesmaid lineup (never mind the fact that I'll probably never get married :P)

I'm scared I'm going to stuff this up somehow. I've been burnt pretty badly when it comes to besties in the past. But I can tell that you're worth the risk. Sorry if I'm ever awkward, or if I ever hurt your feelings or do something stupid to annoy you. I promise I'll always apologise with my tail between my legs and make it up to you with cupcakes and Hahn Solos. ;)

You're the Han to my Chewie, the Jane to my Daria. I am totally irreversibly in hopeless bestie love with you! Doesn't matter where, doesn't matter when! I will be there for ya till the very end! Danger or trouble I'm there on the double you know that you always can call... um, me? (Shutup Kim Possible is way cool! ^_^)

"Jeggings" are retarded,

I'm garbage at drawing, I know. Your lightsaber is meant to be green because I vaguely remember you saying you wanted a green one. If I remembered wrong I'm sorry! :)

The Kindness of Strangers (and everyone, really)

2010-07-03T12:15:00.006+10:00

I will preface the next dramatic sentence with this: I am totally fine(ish) and cuddled up in bed safe at home with my Macbook and my kitty. So, last night I was whisked away in an ambulance for an exciting stint in hospital and a fetching lavender gown. I had an oxygen mask, blood tests, electrodes all over my boobs (as well as other less sexy places), a heart "trace" or something, a urine test, some weird tubes I still don't know the origin of, an IV tube, a syringe I had to blow into (that was a little weird), and two medical professionals whose names I've already forgotten totally saw me topless and didn't even have the decency to follow through on the egg sandwiches they promised me. I mean, that's just courtesy, you know? You want a girl to show you her rack, you give her a damn sandwich!

I digress. The point of this point is that humankind really blew me away last night and this morning. What happened, basically, is that my heart gave out after beating rapidly all day on and off. (It's done this for at least six years very sporadically.) I was on a train and felt so sick and sweaty out of it I thought I might die if I stayed on the train, so tried to get off (halfway between my origin and my destination at a random train station) and from what I can remember and what I've been told, I managed to grab a pole on the station as I fell as I was getting off, and then the next thing I can remember I was in the recovery position on the cold cement.

Readers, I couldn't see much and was very out of it, but I know that at least five or six people got off that carriage with me, grabbed me as I fell, and then refused to leave me until the ambulance came. A railway attendant started taking care of me and called an ambulance and they could have left with a clear conscience knowing I was being looked after, and I told them as best as I could manage to please not stay on my account, but they basically told me kindly to shut up and they were staying. Business men, younger men, a couple of women stayed with me, stroking my hair, holding my hand, taking my pulse, pulling off their coats to lay over me, and to make into makeshift pillows. I heard at least two of them take phone calls and tell the caller they couldn't make it home in time for something. I don't know what these people missed because of me, it was a Friday night and they stayed with me for just under an hour. They swore when an ambulance pulled up into the station and then left, and one man went to stand out in the cold where it had pulled up to make sure they wouldn't leave without me again. "I think he's going to crash tackle the ambulance when they get here next time to make sure they don't leave without her," another man remarked. None of them checked their watches or made any impatient remarks other than concern for me and how long the ambulance was taking. It was so lovely. Every single person that was with me when I collapsed was with me as they put me on a stretcher and put me in the ambulance.

In hospital, to pass the time while we were waiting on my bloodwork, I took a couple of photos of me in my sexy hospital gown and uploaded them to facebook. I posted a status update later mentioning the hospital stay but also, or so I thought, implying that I was mostly fine and in possession as always of my sense of humor. Guys, I couldn't sleep last night because I got text message after text message, phone call after phone call from frantic friends demanding to know what was going on and if I was okay. (I was, embarrassingly, too out of it to even remember you could turn your phone off or onto silent mode). I'd put the phone down just for it to ring out again with a text from someone else. A drunken friend texted seven times and called twice. And when I woke up, she had facebooked me three times, along with practically every other person on my facebook friends - I had countless wall posts and status comments, and the cool thing was, they weren't all from my best friends. Several girls from a forum I'm on were panicking. I had a girl I go to uni with ask me about hospital food. I had a girl I went to high school with and have barely spoken to since then (or even during high school, really) telling me she would visit me with monopoly in tow. A guy friend who is not an emotional sort of guy told me I had no idea how hearing I was in hospital had made him feel and telling me how much he loved me and telling me he was going to bring me pineapple fritters and hugs. (He may have been drunk too, but it was still absolutely lovely!)

Anyway, the point is, that there is absolutely no need to worry about the human race. I've had one person show me the crappy side of humanity in this past week - and I've seen more than thirty strangers and friends show me the absolute best of it. This post, in a way, is my way of trying to thank all those strangers who I can never really thank in person (though I will be sending a shout out in Monday's edition of the free daily newspaper given out to train passengers) and also to sort of remind myself and all of you how great people can be. There have been so many times in my life that I've read something horrifying, or opened a newspaper to nothing but bad news, that I've just wanted to give up on people in general, wondered how they can be so evil. I think it's important to remember that, when it comes down to it, most people will do the right thing and not to worry about those that don't.

Sorry about the weird rant guys! (I know, they're my blogging trademark, right?) My weak and broken heart might have landed me in hospital, but it is so full right now. I'll leave you with some sexy shots of me in hospital!

Monster Girl.

Interviewing: Audrey Bishop of the 200 Portraits Project

2010-06-26T10:00:00.000+10:00

Monsters, today I thought I'd fill you all in on a project my lovely talented friend Audrey is doing at the moment, called the 200 Portraits project. I've had queries about the portrait she did of me (it's my new facebook profile photo) and thought I'd fill you all in about how to score one yourself! Instead of me waffling at you about it, though, I thought I'd get Audrey herself to tell you all about it! She's pretty rad. So follows the first ever interview here at Monster Girl Writes!

MG: Explain the project in a nutshell!

AB: People (mostly people I do not know) send me pictures of themselves and I paint or draw them. I mostly use ink, but I also use some fancy markers (ProMarkers) that my boyfriend bought a while ago when we decided to make a webcomic (this did not make it past the ideas stage, by the way).

MG: What gave you the idea for 200 Portraits?

AB: I'm doing it for a few reasons...Firstly, I just found out that for a few fun and exciting reasons that I shan't go into here, I cannot get a job for a few months, so that means a fair bit of sitting around the house wanting to eat my own legs due to boredom. Secondly, I am going to be working at a festival for home educated families in July, so I figured it would be a good chance to go and do some art with/of/for some other people and faces are the thing I'm best at, so I thought it might be nice to do a bunch of portraits of the people I meet. THIRDLY, last year I did another project where I had to do paintings every day for a month, so I figured that if I was going to get something going, I might as well get something going where I do a certain number of things again. 200 seemed about right.

MG: What are you hoping to get out of the project?

AB: I think it will be pretty awesome when it's over and I have sketchbooks and things full of other people's faces. 200. More people than I can probably fit comfortably in the house I live in. I've had so many different people send me pictures too. One woman sent me a picture of her horse. I'm not amazing at drawing animals, but I fully intend on giving it a go.
Another thing that may or may not happen once I've passed the finish line is an exhibition. 31 Paintings had an exhibition in spite of the fact that it was far less ambitious than this, so that's the aim.

MG: How can Monster Readers get involved?

AB: By going to the website (http://200portraits.info) and sending me a photo! A question I've been asked a lot is 'what kind of photo?' and I have to say...it really doesn't matter (though if you have any other questions, my twitter username is audreyisanidiot). I can make something of most of the things I've been sent and I won't be leaving any out for difficulty reasons. OR, if you're not into that, you can tweet about the project to get people you know involved or donate to the project and I'll send you a pretty picture in the mail (the details for that are also on the site).

MG: Favourite scene in a Star Wars movie?

AB: I have a new love for the scene in the Cantina, with Han Solo being a cool motherf***er and whatnot, mostly because I am going to be production manager on a Star Wars fan film type thing sometime soon and part of it takes place in there so I've been thinking about that one thing more often than I usually would. I also enjoy Han responding to Leia's 'I love you' with 'I know'. My boyfriend does that to me though and it makes me want to murder him...
When I was about 8 or 9, I used to watch 'Return of the Jedi' every day after school and I always just loved that movie as a whole. I can't remember why I loved that one in particular now, though.

As well as the 200 portraits website, Audrey has a blog which you can check out here and you can follow her on twitter here and if you'd like an example of the photo to portrait process, here's the awesome portrait she did for me! It's so cute! Probably could have found a better photo for her to work with though :P

she created this cute little portrait...

from this retarded photo my friend Josh took of me at a party. Yeah, I have a pool cue around my head. I don't even know.
Get involved, Monsters! Send Audrey a photo and see her work her magic!

Australia's First Female Prime Minister

2010-06-24T12:45:00.004+10:00

Normally I shy away from topics like this here at Monster Girl Writes, but I am so excited about this event in Australian history, readers, and it needs celebrating. Today has been a giant step for Australian women. Regardless of whether the switching over of Prime Ministers was fair (I'm not ashamed to say I almost cried), whether she is the right person to lead this country - these things matter, of course, but they're not what I'm here to talk about. No longer can this country say that it has never been led by a woman. This can only be a good thing and this is what I'm celebrating. When the day comes that a woman is elected Prime Minister by the people and not by her party, my heart will be full in this regard, but for now, this is a victory for women of Australia, women of the world, and mankind in general and I am proud to say that we, like so many countries Australians might consider less forward or powerful than ours, have finally found ourselves led by a woman.

I'll stop now before I waffle on, but - yeah. Go Team Girl.

Anosmia: The Wussiest "Disability" Known To Man

2010-06-22T22:00:00.004+10:00

So, something people always find pretty strange about me is that I don't actually have a sense of smell. To be really specific, I have such a weak sense of smell it's practically non-existant. I can smell "something" when I walk past Subway, or if my Mum is cooking rice or rissoles or whatever, for instance, but I can't tell you what I'm smelling, and that's about the only time I can actually smell anything. No, I've never smelt flowers, or a baby. I can tell you that fresh flowers do smell..."fresh" to me, but that's as much as my nose can gather.

Why can't I smell? I have no idea. I could have been born that way, although Mum tells me when I was a baby I used to wrinkle my nose up at things. It could also have something to do with me breaking or fracturing my nose seventy billion times when I was a kid, jumping off a bed spread-eagled as a toddler, jumping onto my Mum's back in a pool, etc. I didn't really think things out when I was a kid. I still kind of don't.

Anyway, not being able to smell, or "anosmia" is actually classified as a disease but obviously it's the lamest one in existence. Can you imagine me trying to sign up for the Special Olympics? "I can't smell, can I try out for shot put?" "Get the f*ck out of our stadium, Miss." However, that doesn't mean that anosmia doesn't have its disadvantages, and for the purposes of educating the blogging world, I thought I'd outline a few.

I'm pretty much screwed in the case of a gas leak.
I didn't even know what a fart was for years after it was common knowledge for most kids. This was really embarrassing. I just pretended I knew what people were going on about when they made fart jokes. Also, when people shoot the blame in your direction, and you are embarrassed because you don't understand what they're talking about, it makes you look really guilty, even if you didn't "deal it".
I have no way of knowing if milk is off. Or any other food, really. If it looks okay and the use-by date is still safe, I'll chug it down and that is just not going to end happily.
I have no idea if clothes are safe to wear - my room isn't always the neatest and so sometimes I don't know if something's clean, or how much wear I can get out of a jumper. Luckily my brother is usually pretty nice and will sniff items of clothing for me.
Forget my clothes - I don't know if I stink. This made me insecure a lot in high school. You know how kids joke around and tell people they stink as lame insults in school? Not so funny when you don't know if it could be true or not.
People asking you to "smell this, it's amazing, seriously, give it a whiff" happens far more often than you'd think if you weren't anosmic and having to deal with this all the time.
If I have babies, I will never be able to smell them (I hear babies smell pretty great) or know when they need changing. I will probably either let my kid go around drinking off milk and wearing a dirty diaper for hours longer than any good mother. I don't even know if I want kids at all, and sure, if that day ever comes I will most likely have a Parenting Teammate in the form of a baby-daddy, but the thought of this still concerns me. I don't want to be the mother who lets their kids get nappy rash and drink off milk and go to school smelling awful, I really don't.

However, just so you don't all get the wrong idea about "my kind", here are some good things about us anosmics too: we're probably cleaner than everyone else, because we're so paranoid we shower a lot, but if we're home alone we can go days before we need to shower. Therefore we're way more environmentally friendly! We don't care if you're smelly or rip one off in front of us, so we make kickass girlfriends - although it's sort of polite not to actually fart in someone's face regardless of whether they can smell - too many guys have asked if they can fart in my face and the answer is always no. Sorry, I don't need your butt in my face for any reason! Some of our other senses are often over-developed, which is very cool, especially if you're a comic-book nerd like me and love the comics and movie Daredevil. (Don't judge me, goddamn it! It's a decent flick!)

Any closeted anosmics out there brave enough to come forward? Know anyone with this "crippling" disability? Stories, Monster Readers! I need stories!

Until next time, you smellyskaters!

Monster Gal

A random musing on death and posting into the future

2010-06-18T14:22:00.000+10:00

Can I tell you guys something weird? Actually, it doesn't really matter if you want me to or not, I'm going to anyway. When I schedule a blog post for "the future", sometimes I think about what would happen if I died before it was published automatically. Maybe a rumour would get out - Monster Girl is dead! And twitter would be atweet - okay, it really wouldn't, hardly anybody follows me on my twitter (like that subtle plug there?) but you know what I mean - and some of my blog readers might hear about it and freak out - I'd like to think some of you might freak out, just indulge me here - and click on my blog in curiosity, and - "Oh. They said she died yesterday but here is a post of hers published an hour ago! Clearly she is alive and well." But I might not be alive and well! I could be quite, quite dead and you'd never know! Well, you'd eventually know, but not for a while, and my misleading blog posts wouldn't help the matter would they? And now I'm wondering if this has ever happened to anyone for real but I don't even know what I'd type into the google search engine to find out. "Blog post automatically published after blogger's death"? Well, actually that seems fairly straightforward.

Do any of you worry about nonsense like this, Monster Friends? Do you schedule posts in the future? I rarely ever do, and I think this right here is probably why. I just don't have the mental fortitude for scheduled blog posts.

Anyway, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go spend the next few hours trolling the internet for blog-related crimes. It's just something I've got to do.

Monster Art: Courtney Brims

2010-06-16T13:30:00.003+10:00

Hey there Monsterz! I thought I'd take some time out from playing Pokemon Pearl on my DS and eating all the cookies I baked yesterday to finally getting around to showing you another of my favourite artists, Courtney Brims. Mainly because the biscuits were starting to make me feel sick, but also because she's amazing.

Courtney is a Brisbane girl like myself who focuses on the fairytale. The way she uses hair to tell a story is amazing. I had the pleasure of going to one of Courtney's art shows last November here in Brisbane and I was absolutely amazed by all the detail that goes into her work. It shouldn't have surprised me - you can see how detailed her work is, but seeing the pencil lines up close was something else. She's an Element Eden advocate so her work has been featured on Element Eden products - I still have yet to track any down, though, unfortunately. She's one of my favourite artists because her work completely encompasses so many of my favourite styles, animals, themes, etc. I feel like I'm finding myself in her work whenever I look at it. I even based a short story for uni on her work last year - it did not even remotely do her art justice, but such is life.

You can find her website with all her amazing pictures here and she's recently started a blog as well which you might like to check out as well. As always, let me know what you think - have you seen Courtney's work before? Do you have a favourite piece? I have lots of personal favourites I didn't feature here which you can find in her gallery. Also, if you have a favourite artist, link me to them in the comments so I can check out their stuff!

lots of arty love,

Monster Girl (who has eaten far too many butterscotch biscuits)

Be A Movie Friend

2010-06-05T19:16:00.005+10:00

This is probably going to be another one of my trademark long Monster Rants, I saw a post on tumblr and it got me thinking.

All our lives, we watch shows and movies and read books in which the perfect life is framed. No, I'm not going to get into the social construct that is life. That's a whole 'nother post in itself. I wanted to rant a bit on the way friendships and relationships are constructed, and our expectations. Let's face it, in movies and television, and books, and magazines, whatever - we're shown what the ideal friendship and relationship should be. The ugly truth of the matter is, though, that people are multi-dimensional. People bitch, people gossip, people are wounded, people deal with conflict in ways that aren't effective, and most of all? Some people don't care. Some people don't care about their friends in the golden way we're shown on television. Some people like their friends, and like spending time with them, and will go out of their way to socialise with them, but don't care what's going on inside of them. Not everyone will pick up the phone at 3am. Not everyone finds it easy to tell their friends they love them, or that they're looking pretty damn awesome today. Is this okay? Absolutely. Everybody works differently, and that's a marvellous thing. The thing is, though?

Everybody deserves a Movie Friend. At least, I think so. Everyone deserves a Willow, a Gabrielle, a Chewie. And, you know what? They're totally out there. That was the other lesson that I was slow to learn. After I had lost faith in having the sort of friends I was seeing on television, it was hard for me to lose the cynical lens and see that they're out there. Not only that, but I actually have lots of them. My friend Jon is totally open with me, he gives fantastic advice, he doesn't judge me on my flaws, he's available, he texts me photos of things that he thinks I'll appreciate. My friend Will, who when shit hit the fan last year, dropped his plans immediately, told me to fuck off when I told him to keep them, and came over just to hold me as I cried and Full House droned on in the background, and then did the exact same thing again the next week. My friend Sarah, who is one of the most beautiful and friendly spirits I will ever meet, who will hold my hand, plait my hair, rub my back, let me waffle shit about boys that I should have stopped talking about a long time ago. Heck, my friend Kezzy, who whenever I am feeling down, googles my favourite animals and sends me cute pictures of them, and doesn't shut me up when I talk far too much. These are just a few examples I've chosen to mention - this post isn't about dropping name bombs, but the other amazing people in my life who aren't mentioned are no less appreciated.

There are so many people in this world that are truly excited for your accomplishments, who will drop everything when your heart is breaking, who will tell you how cool you are or compliment your rocking style, because they notice you, appreciate you. Friends who will let you borrow their clothes, who will buy you a block of chocolate or a coffee when you need one. Friends who will let you talk about the same boy month after month and who, okay might tell you to shut the fuck up sometimes, but will hate him for you, and won't give your other friends condescending looks over the table any time you mention his name. Friends who will tell you when you've fucked up, and then help you fix it. Friends that will apologise even when they think they don't have to. Friends who take you out on Hot Friend Dates, friends that trust you with their Millenium Falcon, friends who will take your body across the world because they know you want to be buried next to your brother. Friends who will be there for you in these amazing ways, not just sometimes, but consistently. Movie Friends. TV Friends.

I think everyone needs to find these people in their lives, and value them. And if these are the sort of friends you want, be one too. Sometimes complimenting others is hard. Sometimes, fighting envy is hard. Sometimes not bitching is hard, and sometimes you're sick of having the same talk with a friend who just will not give up on someone that is a massive douchebag, or you just don't feel like going to pick them up from the middle of nowhere when they were too stupid to remember to fill up the tank. But you need these sort of people, so be one.

Look at the friends you have, and think about whether they would bring you a razor on a Saturday night in the middle of your date like Lily does for Robin in How I Met Your Mother. Drive you hours out of town to make a roller derby bout like in Whip It. Ask yourself if you could be arsed taking someone a razor on a Saturday night. Think about that person on facebook who always writes on your wall or links you funny things they think you'd like. Do you link them back? Go do that right now! Got a friend who you dragged to some obscure social event they hadn't even heard of because you know they'd be the only one to go with you? Do something with them that they'd like to do, even if it's not 100% your thang.

Are you a Movie Friend? Do you have a Movie Bestie, or multiple Movie Besties, in your own life? And who are your favourite ones from tv, books etc?

And to all my Movie Friends out there - friends who make the effort to read this blog because they're genuinely interested in my writing, and friends I've never linked to here, but are still just as important - you know who you are, and I love you. I appreciate the shit out of you. You are the Chewie to my Han. If you need me at 3am, my phone is always on.

Hello June!

2010-06-01T18:49:00.005+10:00

Welcome back, June! I am optimistic that you will bring me good things. May treated me pretty badly, I have to admit, but we had some good times too and overall, you ended pretty well, I guess.

Fun in May

fun with friends, sleeping in with my cat, getting pretty good grades, bear ears, being awesome at roller skating, secret dalliances, starbucks runs, silly text messages, sharing a bed, free comic book day, playing in the park, Iron Man 2, getting drunk, Modern Family, rediscovering the Sims 3, way too much pasta, my friend's band playing half-time at the roller derby, making new friends

Looking forward to in June

cuddles, holidays, movie days with friends, dragging my gay buddies to a gay skate session for Brisbane's Pride Month, hitting the gay clubs (June seems set to be a pretty gay sort of month, hmm) a housewarming, a 21st, a 23rd, the next roller derby bout, a potential bonfire night, a horror movie marathon, gigs, Brisbane's Lifeline charity bookfest, the Finders Keepers Markets

And some May highlights in picture form :)

being cute and stealing baby kisses

being pleased with a cute thrifted fondue set

being weird

being bored

being at the roller derby

being charitable at a starlight foundation cocktail party with girlfriends

being a bit too content to stay home with nerdy movies and pasta

being drunk at a derelicte trash party

"being my own hero"
How was your May? What are you crazy kids looking forward to in June? And most importantly, don't I look dashing in a trash bag?
Love you all!

Parenting Practice and Kitties

2010-05-29T06:43:00.003+10:00

Why having a cat is (I imagine) good practice for having babies

*especially if your cat is scared of everything and borderline retarded*

You develop that sixth sense that tells you something is being eaten that shouldn't be eaten, furniture is being climbed that shouldn't be climbed, etc.
Patience. You have it now.
You suddenly have a lot less privacy and your personal belongings suddenly are treated with a lot less consideration.
Getting up at three in the morning isn't that bad. Really.
You master the art of forcing healthy eating, even if it involves sneaking the healthy things in with the yummier things.
You learn to just deal with the fact that sometimes, even though you might be quite happy sleeping alone, you're going to get a little face waking you up at an ungodly hour asking if they can come sleep in your bed.
Poop no longer grosses you out. True story.
Bathing a child who doesn't want a bath? Walk in the park after bathing a cat who doesn't want a bath!
You learn that reason and logic have no place when you are dealing with a selfish individual who needs you for everything and decide they need everything...now.
You learn that even though you didn't think you were capable of hurting a fly, if anyone or anything comes after your little one, you can and will f*ck their shit up.
You know that thing babies do, when you hold them for an obscene amount of time, then put them down and they'll start bawling and you have to pick them up again? Yeah...wussy cats do that too.

Molly Ringwald, thank you. If or when I ever procreate, I am going to be all over child-rearing. I will raise those babies so hard they won't know what hit them!

silly kitty

On "If it ain't broke...but possibly might be soon"

2010-05-26T17:55:00.003+10:00

Hey Monster Peeps!

So! For absolutely ages I've been in the market for a proper wallet. I've been relying on an ancient old coin purse that, while pretty cute, was somewhat - okay, completely - impractical. It was *just* big enough to hold cards, and of course they were all squished together, and then I just sort of jammed my cash in the sides, then had to pull out cash to get out coins, because they wedged themselves under the cash and cards - it was mayhem I tell you!

MAYHEM!

Anyway, so I finally forced myself to get a new wallet. I basically went to a giant shopping centre and was like, "Missy, you are not to leave this building until you have a new wallet, do you hear me?" What took me so long, you ask? Well, the thing is, I am fussy. I refuse to buy ugly things, no matter how practical they are, and I (mostly) refuse to buy nice-looking things if they're not practical.

Until today.

I am a little ashamed to admit I basically just purchased the first wallet I saw that I didn't hate the look of. It felt a little flimsy but had decent enough compartments for coins, cards, cash, etc. Exhausted from being at uni from a ridiculous hour this morning - I finally did that Plath presentation this morning by the way, I think it went okay - I had zilch patience left and handed over my meagre funds. I immediately plopped myself into a couch in the middle of the shopping centre and proceeded to put all the stuff from my coin purse into this new purse. Readers, with lots of coins in the central coin pouch, the thing would barely close, and the cards were kind of hard to get out of the slots.

Do you think I could be arsed returning it? Yeah, that's a negative on that one. Instead of something sensible that (in my defence, the computers in the store were down and they were handwriting everything so it would have been quite an ordeal) I instead decided that if it does break, I can keep it closed with a scrunchie.

Guys, what is wrong with me?

Please tell me I'm not alone here and sometimes some of you do impractical stuff like this as well? Please?

hey look! I tied some grey fabric around it to keep it from bursting open, and put some funky badges on it! Surely this cute-ification overrides any of it's potential flaws! ...um...

On a completely unrelated note, have you guys been watching Modern Family? It's pretty great, just quietly. I'm going to catch up on it while chowing some macaroni and cheese, and not thinking about how I suck as a consumer. Hope you guys enjoy your night too! Olive juice you all!

Dear Monster Boy Readers...

2010-05-16T19:39:00.004+10:00

Things Boys Need To Wear More Of (In Monster Girl's Humble Opinion)

hats
blazers/suit jackets over t-shirts
vintage t-shirts
geeky t-shirts
band t-shirts (...okay fine I like tees!)
brown corduroy jeans
bow ties
vests
glasses
vans
earth tones
snuggly jumpers
ripped jeans
novelty/kiddie watches or watches with thick leather bands that look like armbands
jackets and coats
basically anything Ron Weasley or Rupert Grint would wear

So I'm bored tonight. Sue me. Are there actually any boy readers out there? Girls, do you share a similar taste in mens attire or are you sitting there going, "RON WEASLEY, MONSTER GIRL?! REALLY? RON WEASLEY? WHAT THE FUDGE?"

Ewoks: Haters Gonna Hate

2010-05-11T23:53:00.006+10:00

(Warning: Star Wars rant ahead!)

Dear Internet,

This is a hard blog post for me to write. I don't live under a rock. I know how most of you feel about Ewoks. "Do I want to ostracise myself? Over Star Wars?" I asked myself. But you know what? Yes. If I am going to be judged for anything, it may as well be Star Wars, because, what else is there, you know?

(Lots of things, I know. I know this, Internet. I know there's, like, food, and shelter, and love, and sex, and the Beatles, and Neil Patrick Harris. I know. But it's Monster Girl you're talking to here, I'm going to get dramatic about my 'Wars.)

Anyway, here I go, putting it - and my heart - out there: I like Ewoks. I am a fan. For most of my life, Return of the Jedi has been my favourite Star Wars movie, because of the Ewoks. I have a Wicket keychain. Whenever I've played Monopoly Star Wars for Windows '95 I've kicked up the most embarrassing stink if I don't get to buy Endor. You get my drift. Even now I'm older and might not be able to make such an easy call on a favourite episode, I still feel 'Jedi' slipping out of my mouth if anyone asks, out of sheer habit.

It's not that I don't hear what you're saying about the fuzzy little guys. They are a bit retarded and cutesy. They are so plainly marketed towards kids it's insane. They are the Jar Jar of the original trilogy. It's not at all feasible that a planet full of teddy bears could be so instrumental in saving the entire galaxy. I get it. You're not wrong.

The thing is: I like cute (as if you couldn't tell from my "review" of Alice in Wonderland for DS in which I used the word cute about seventy billion times). I don't care if Ewoks were written in to make Star Wars more accessible to children. How exactly is that a bad thing? Ewoks were the drawing card for this little girl and probably many others and speaking as one of those little girls grown up I would just like to say Thank You For That. It's not that I wasn't taken with the little C3PO magnetic toys and R2D2 tumblers from Pizza Hut in the early 90s. It's not that I didn't chuckle at Han Solo's dialogue long before I understood it completely. But there were teddies, man, and they had tree houses, in a kickass forest. They reeled me in and made me fall in love, hard.

And you know what? Speaking as the geek who always roots for the losing team in a sporting match, I like a good underdog story. The Ewoks invented the quintessential "The Little Engine that Could" tale, let's be honest. They Could, and They Did, and for all of you who just want them out of your galaxy, well, f*ck you, because the galaxy is not yours, it's everyone's. It belongs to guys who saw A New Hope seven times in opening week in the late seventies, housewives who only saw a Star Wars movie for the first time last month, old men older than Obi, as well as little girls who almost wore out Return of the Jedi on VHS.

Okay, I've gotten that dirty secret off my chest. I can die with a clear conscience now. I really do love you, Internet. Sorry to get so touchy!

Fuzzy cute cuddles,Monster Girl.

Free Comic Book Day 2010

2010-05-01T09:52:00.005+10:00

Hey there Monster Friends! Today, May the 1st, is Free Comic Book Day all over the world which basically means if you go to any participating comic book store you can pick up one or a few of a number of select comic titles. The aim of Free Comic Book Day is to get more people interested in comics and for the industry to give back, and this is something I'd strongly urge you all to participate in. Who says no to free stuff, right?
You can check if any (or all) of your local stores are participating by logging onto the website - you can simply click the image above for the link. :)

Monster Girl Gaming: Alice in Wonderland (DS)

2010-04-29T15:00:00.006+10:00

Hey all! In case you haven't noticed, my little blog has been more than a bit boring lately. I really do apologise. In trying to remedy that and provide some content that isn't, well, donkeyshite, I thought I'd kick off something I've been meaning to do here for a while and that is tell you all about some of my favourite video games! I personally think there are still not enough girl gamers out there and that's mainly because a lot of games are not that female accessible. That's not to say girls can't like war games or strategy games etc - hell yes we can, and we do! However the market is definitely geared towards males and games are usually made with this in mind. While I love me some nerdy annihilation games too, I thought I'd try and get a segment on Monster Girl Writes going in which I tell you all about some of my favourite games that I feel are made to be girl-friendly, or games you might not initially think to pick up. Let me know if game reviews are something you'd like to see more of here!
Okay, so to kick this off I thought I'd tell you my new favourite Nintendo DS game, Alice in Wonderland.

The Gist

This game is based on the new movie by Tim Burton, but unlike other video games that have come out based on the movie, the DS version goes in a completely different direction. This is most evident style wise. Guys, this is the cutest darn game you will ever find. Ever. The entire game makes me "squee" out loud. Alice here is more like a small child, and trots along happily after the White Rabbit or Alan Rickman - I mean, the Catterpillar Absalom - looking absolutely adorable. I mean, you can tell just from looking at the case - CUTE AS HECK. (To get an idea of what I mean, check out the game trailer) The aim of the game is fairly simple: you explore Wonderland and collect puzzle pieces trying to stop it from falling apart.

Why It Rocks

Did I not mention the part where this game is INSANELY CUTE? It's bright, fun and CUTE. The characters are REALLY CUTE. The animated segways are PRETTY DAMN CUTE. You get my point. Seriously, you'll see what I mean. The game is also really engrossing, challenging without being frustrating (unless you're Monster Girl and are a complete tard and your old DS carks it halfway through a level so when you start playing again a month later you get really confused) and follows the movie's story enough to please fans of the film, but also branches out enough so that even if you didn't love the movie you can still get something out of it.

Who Should Play?

Simply put, Alice fans. Whether you love the original books or the new movie or both, you're going to be pleased with this game adaptation. It doesn't require much brain-power at all and while the game would be perfectly stimulating for pre-teens and older teens, it's also ideal for older girls wanting to relax and waste some time between classes or on their lunch break at work, or relaxing in a squishy armchair with a coffee at Starbucks.

In Other Nerdy News...

Check out these skins for your DS featuring the work of Anne-Julie, who happens to be one of your old Monster Girl's favourite artists dating back from the days when Monster Girl still frequented deviant-art. Anne-Julie's whimsical art is inspired by fairytales, including Alice in Wonderland. If your DS is in need of a makeover, check these out, they kick ass.

What are some of your favourite Monster Games, dearest readers?

Immensely Frustrating Things Of Immense Frustration

2010-04-27T18:14:00.003+10:00

Things Making Monster Girl's Head Explode In Frustration Currently:

Having writer's block for an assignment I was actually looking forward to writing
Being slack RE uni and life in general
The pod racing level on Lego Star Wars
The chocolate in the fridge that is my father's that I'm not allowed to nom
My body being inexplicably sore everywhere
Not having a decent job
Both lamps I have for my desk not working
Wishing I was cooler
Having a boy stuck in my mind and knowing I'm not stuck in his
Never having anything worthwhile to blog about any more

Blah blah blah. Sorry guys!

On Turning 22

2010-04-24T17:26:00.000+10:00

Guess what, Monster Friends? Wednesday was totally my twenty second birthday. I have been having a lovely birthday week indeed - my friend Peter wrote me a beautiful short story and my friend Sarah made me a gorgeous illustrated booklet with coupons I can redeem for massages, shoulders to cry on, and coffee dates. I spent my rainy birthday having a nachos and homemade birthday cake lunch date with my friends and two gorgeous baby girls (one of which sang me her version of the 'Happy Birthday' song which was basically just her repeating "berday" over and over again - hello adorable.) I went over to a friend's city apartment and we watched a favourite episode of Xena and Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog. In a weird turn of events after that I then headed to the mana bar with The Necronaut and somehow ended up crashing 80's night and kissing Jareth from Labyrinth. Um, what? Yes. Yes, I kissed Jareth from Labyrinth on my birthday? What's that, you're jealous? I KNOW.

On Thursday my Mum and I took an obscenely long break from work and had coffee, milkshakes and donuts, and she bought me a new eyeliner and two lip butters - vanilla and buttercream. I think she (fairly accurately) assumes that me being the tomboy I am, I would never actually spend what little money I have on beauty products, so she decided to spoil me. I'm not complaining! Thursday night I headed over to my married friends' place for a potato and pasta dinner party, some Sega Megadrive and the original X-Men animated series on dvd. Last night things got a little crazy and a drinking/truth or dare night with uni friends ended up with all the boys in their underpants and me on top of the roof of Brisbane's Hotel Orient causing way too much trouble. Now it's penne cheese pasta bake, more rain, script writing, cleaning, assignments and Lego Star Wars. Or, it will be. You know, once I quit browsing blogs and actually Get Off My Arse.

Should I be feeling older? Wiser? I don't know. Should I be blogging more? Better? Yes. Sorry, guys. I'm a bit stuck for inspiration lately. Or maybe I have too much of it, I don't know. :)

A guilty g'bye for now Monsterz!

nachos with my grrl

me and mah cake :)
kissing a girl-Jareth at midnight

Things I Love Thursday

2010-04-15T18:20:00.001+10:00

Crapsticks, has it really been over ten days?! I'm sorry for not being around, guys. I've been sort of bogged down with uni and never quite seem to be in the blogging headspace. Luckily for me, when all else fails, TiLT!

Things I Love Thursday:

Having my assignment mapped out and a third of it written five days before it's due (this is a big deal for me. I'm a night-before kinda gal), apple strudel, literary discussions, study days curled up in the library, sort of working but really sharing my favourite songs, being shown hilarious youtube videos and playing worms world party, that free coffee on my coffee card, winter approaching, my tamagotchi, earning money, baby snuggles, when my hair sort of goes like Penelo's from Final Fantasy, my mummy buying me a mocha and a double chocolate muffin with cream cheese, my friends in creative writing saying they might write me stories for my birthday next week, tracing the lines on someone's hands, my red boots (again), approaching birthday fun, being back at uni after the holidays (don't judge me), chips and aioli, my little camera Elphie, winning a bag of chocolate easter eggs in class, getting "lost" in Brisbane somehow, cuddle time, wearing someone else's clothes, kitty sneezes, my grandpa slippers, photo booth silliness, nerd conventions involving a Xena cast member, pacman energy drinks and $1 issues of Batgirl, watching bones with a giant bowl of popcorn with my sister, script-writing (even if I'm way behind), experimental coffee (ie making coffee and throwing in a teaspoon of caramel hot chocolate flavouring :P) adorable heart-fluttery conversations until ridiculous hours of the morning, leading to somehow going a week without a proper night's sleep and not even caring.

Happy Easter from Monster Girl!

2010-04-04T10:18:00.004+10:00

Hello Monster Bunnies! Happy Easter! I just had a lovely Easter breakfast with my family. Easter is always nice at the Monster House - we put the Easter tablecloth my Oma embroidered on the table, colour boiled eggs, eat croissants, buy each other too much chocolate, string the bells from around the Lindt chocolate bunnies' necks around Molly Ringwald's and watch her get indignant because of all her own jangling, and actually eat together as a family for one of the only times all year. How do you celebrate Easter in your home? I hope you're all eating way too much chocolate as you're reading this - I'll see you later, okay? I have a kilo of my own to get through ;)

Script Frenzy: Are You In?

2010-03-29T20:31:00.001+10:00

Hey guys, this is just a quick shout out to let you know (or remind you, possibly) that Script Frenzy starts this Thursday so if you haven't signed up get and love scriptwriting - or want to try your hand at it for the first time - now is your moment! If you don't know much about Script Frenzy, it's basically a scriptwriting version of NaNoWriMo - you have the month of April to write 100 pages. Up to the challenge? You still have a couple of days to brainstorm and develop character and plot ideas - of course, you can't actually start writing until April 1 but you can definitely get your plan on now so you're prepared and you can jump straight into counting off those pages come Thursday. You can write a script for a comic book, movie, tv show, anything, so the sky is really your limit! You know, except, it has to be a script... ;)

Comment this post with your username if you're participating and I can add you to my 'Writing Buddies' and we can form a support network :P It's going to be so much fun, I hope you'll all consider jumping on board!

Lots of love,

Your Friendly Neighbourhood Monster Girl

Monster Girl Cooks: Savoury French Toast

2010-03-28T17:21:00.004+10:00

Hangover food. We all have our favourites, don't we? For some, it's cheap McDonalds or Hungry Jacks (Burger King, if you will), for others, simply more alcohol. For me, it's savoury french toast. Delicious, simple, greasy, cheesy, and appropriate for any any time during the day, really. Now, I should put a disclaimer in here: not everyone is a fan of Monster Girl's Savoury French Toast. Salt in french toast?! They exclaim. Cheese? French toast is all about the syrup, man! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH THIS MADNESS? Well, to them I say, pfft. Sweet french toast has it's moments, sure. But I sure as hell won't be turning to syrup when I'm fighting off a cold or a case of the vodkas. Cheese, please. Always cheese.

Monster Girl's Savoury French Toast

You'll need:

bread (about three slices)

an egg

about three tablespoons of milk

a pinch (or two or three liberal pinches, if you're Monster Girl) of salt

grated cheese

Okay, this one is a no-brainer, folks, hence it's hangover appeal. Grab a bowl that won't be too awkward to dunk a whole slice of bread in flat, crack your egg, add your milk and salt, and whisk with a fork. Dunk your bread on both sides and pop into the frying pan. Keep an eye on it, peering precariously underneath with a spatula every now and then, and when it looks good (my definition of this is yellow-y brown and crispy, you might like it a little less crispy), flip it over. Put the grated cheese on the cooked side, and then when the cheese is melted and the underside is done (this actually convieniently usually takes the exact same amount of time) pop your toast on a plate and get going on the other slices! I find three to be the perfect amount for me, but any of you with bird-like appetites or those of you who like to chow down like a hungry hungry hippo the morning after might disagree.

Okay, and, I know it's standard of me to recommend all meals to be served with a glass of milk here on Monster Girl Writes, but I'm breaking with tradition, because you know what really goes great with savoury french toast? A banana milkshake. Just saying.

What's your hangover food of choice, Monsterz?

Molly Ringwald and Monster Girl: Ready for their closeup

2010-03-26T10:30:00.003+10:00

Feeling quite ill and run down - I've been told I've got a four day virus, which means I have two more days to go! - so took the day off uni and am cuddled up at home trying to keep the worst of it at bay with soothers and painkillers. Don't you love how kitties always know when you're sick and like to come up for cuddles to show their sympathy? All of our family cats have always done it, we have a billion photos of us as kids lying pathetically on a couch with a cat spooning us protectively. Anyway so Molly Ringwald climbed up onto my lap and is clinging onto my knee and won't stop licking me. I figured what else is an ill Monster Girl to do on a Friday morning other than have a mac photo booth session with her kitty?

Thanks Molly! Hope you're all feeling better than I am today, Monsterz!

Brisbane's Mana Bar

2010-03-23T11:04:00.007+10:00

So on Saturday afternoon the troops were rallied and we headed to the opening of Brisbane's new gaming and drinking establishment, the Mana Bar. The Mana Bar has been in the works for a long time and this weekend it finally opened up shop and hundreds and hundreds of nerds opened their hearts and flocked on over. People lined up for three hours before opening to make sure they'd get in. We were lucky - we came about the time the doors opened so the line was pretty small after the first round was let in.
The place was pretty tiny - only 50 people were allowed in at once - and no food was served or allowed inside (which I believe is actually a violation of RSA policies, but anyway!) and a lot of the time you couldn't hear the games very well over the music and the crowd. I'm hoping if the bar takes off (and if opening weekend was any indication, it's more than likely) that they might expand and iron out the kinks - they really need a larger space, comfier seating, a way to play the games and hear them properly, (a friend suggested a booth-type setup with individual gaming stations which I think is a great idea) and some sort of food available.
However, the concept is a fantastic one and the cocktails weren't too pricey in the grand scheme of things. I grabbed a Princess Peach cocktail which to be honest had me tipsy by the end! Definitely okay value. They had a Jack Daniels slushie machine which was kind of an awesome idea and relatively cheap. I had some of my friend's JD slushie and it was pretty nice. They had a pretty great games selection, and everyone was super friendly and I would definitely recommend heading down there and checking the place out if you're a Brisbanite or in town.
Are you into video gaming, Monster Friends? Did you do something equally nerdy with your weekend?
A Princess Peach cocktail and my Nintendo DS :)

me and my friends lining up outside (found on some guy's blog, original pic is over here)

cabinets

Leprechaun Bread, Guinness Cupcakes and Crotch Shots

2010-03-17T12:16:00.007+10:00

Happy St. Patrick's Day, everyone! I hope you're all wearing green and getting suitably drunk out of your skulls today! Personally I celebrated "St. Paddy's" on the weekend at a friend's houseparty, and hit it a bit too hard - I shall be staying away from the grog for a good time to come I think! Nevertheless it was a great night. I baked Guinness cupcakes with a chocolate ganache and green Bailey's buttercream frosting which turned out pretty fantastic, I made some "leprechaun bread" (read: fairy bread with only green sprinkles!), I dressed up and wore the amazing shamrock tee my friend Tash gave me for my birthday last year over a tiny black dress and black lace leggings, (resulting in several embarrassing/hilarious photos taken of me sprawled over a couch with my dress up around my waist while I squealed things I luckily don't remember), I painted my nails emerald green, I kissed at least two different boys (nothing too saucy!), I had my mobile phone taken off me for my own good, I guzzled green vodka, and I don't really know whether my Irish grandfather Kevan would be rolling in his grave or wanting to high-five me from the beyond. I'm hoping for the latter.

Are you guys into St. Patrick's Day? Did you/will you do anything outrageous? Let me know lassies (and laddies of course)!

xoxo, Monster Girl In Recovery

The Big Issue

2010-03-12T15:30:00.002+10:00

You know what is a marvellous thing? The Big Issue is a marvellous thing. And I don't understand why more people don't see it as such. I've seen people with "No I Don't Want a F*cking Big Issue" badges, and I've seen a lot of open hostility towards Big Issue vendors by people that you'd think, just from looking at them, were respectable members of society.

For those of you who aren't from Australia, The Big Issue is a fortnightly magazine published and distributed by Australia's homeless. Half of the money you hand over when you pick up one of the mags goes straight to the vendor you're buying it from, and the other half also goes to helping find creative solutions to helping Australia's homeless. It is such an amazing initiative, really - not only are these people discontent to just resign themselves to crappy lives, forming a collective and taking control of their situations, they're doing so by creating something tangible and putting it out there into the public.

So not only is this a fantastic concept, the magazine itself is actually pretty interesting and fairly well-written. While the publication often does contain articles and opinion pieces about Australia's homeless, this is in no way the theme of the magazine. Today I picked up the latest issue to find an editorial and feature article about Tim Burton and his version of Alice in Wonderland, a feature article on Alison Mosshart of The Kills and The Dead Weather, several really interesting literary, film and music reviews, some fascinating stories by people who lost their homes to fire, a piece on thrifting, an interesting idea about social networking, an amazing collection of photographs from the 2010 world press photo contest including an absolutely amazing shot of Obama and one of the Gaza strip which I was interested to see having recently learnt about the Gaza situation having read an article in Yen, and a really great article on volunteering.

I know that when vendors on the street approach you to buy anything, it can be pretty intimidating. I too am someone who tends to bury her face in the cement and shuffle past at the speed of light. However, I think everyone needs to be aware that you can make a difference by looking up once in a while. If you like to read, and are about to jump on the bus or train home, why not grab yourself something to keep yourself busy on the trip every once in a while? I love myself a good Starbucks mocha. A no-whip vanilla mocha from Starbucks sets me back exactly $5. The Big Issue also sells for $5. My reasoning is, if I can afford a mocha from Starbucks whenever I find myself bleary-eyed and braving the streets of Brisbane on my way to uni, I can indulge in a good read for my trip home every once in a while. I don't buy every issue. Truthfully, I only buy a mag when I spot something interesting on the cover. But you know what? Every time I do buy a copy of The Big Issue, I immediately feel terrific.

What about you guys? Do many of you already read The Big Issue? Are you involved in or aware of any other awesome social initiatives like it? I'd love to hear your thoughts, or any suggestions as to other cool projects like this we should check out.

Oh, and The Big Issue #349 is available from vendors until the 15th, so if you're in Australia and you wanted to check out the Burton and Alison Mosshart articles, I'd hit up the city in the next couple of days. Peace out, Monster Homies! :)

Alice: The Monster Review

2010-03-10T18:55:00.004+10:00

Disclaimer: This (lengthy) blog post contains some criticism of the new Alice in Wonderland movie by Tim Burton. If Tim Burton can do no wrong in your eyes, turn them away from the following words :) If you haven't seen the movie, don't worry, I won't really be dropping any spoiler bombs.

Greetings and Salutations, Monsterz. Have most of you gone to check out the new Alice movie in cinemas yet? I went to see it last week, and I have to say that it did not live up to my expectations and left me feeling a little bit disappointed. As I went with a large group and everyone else felt the same way but most of us couldn't quite articulate exactly what it is that was "off" about the film, I decided to explore the movie and where I felt it's strengths and weaknesses lay in my little corner of the interwebs. :)

Visually I am in love with this film. The heavy colour scheme works deliciously and the set design is absolutely amazing. Tim Burton is well known for aesthetically pleasing films and there is no debating that he deserves such a favourable reputation. The costume design, also, goes absolutely above and beyond. In spoiler still from the film alone you could see how much detail has been put into these pieces, and so in terms of creating a visual Wonderland, Burton could not have surpassed himself - although I will say that I would have liked to see more of Wonderland itself. The only criticism I have in regards to how the movie worked visually is that there was not enough within the film to warrant the movie being in 3D. Unfortunately a lot of the cinemas in my area are only showing the movie in 3D, which means anyone paying an adult fare (like a few of my friends) has been left with no option but to pay $20 for a movie ticket, which is a significant amount more than they'd have to pay otherwise. Twenty dollars would be a lot to pay for a movie with heavy incorporation of 3D technology, so obviously it seems an exorbitant price to pay when the entire length of the movie I was only aware of the 3D effects once - when some spores floated out of the screen.

When I have managed to catch any (few-and-far-between) criticisms of the film, the first thing that is always mentioned is actress Mia Wasikowska, who plays Alice. Negative reviewers peg her acting as stiff and unexperienced, however personally I felt as though she did a fine job. Of course, she is fairly unexperienced, but I don't felt as though it showed remotely. Her Alice was everything it should have been. My opinion is the same regarding the rest of the cast - of course, apart from Mia Wasikowska, the rest of the cast are all seasoned and highly regarded actors, and so to expect anything less than a stellar performance from Helena Bonham Carter or Johnny Depp (and everyone that comprised the fantastic supporting cast) would be naive, I think.

In terms of writing I think this film is over-hyped. With such amazing actors in such a beautiful movie, and with everyone going into the movie with a "Burton lens" it's a lot easier to overlook the fact that in actuality the storyline and the characters themselves left a lot to be desired. If you have seen the movie, think for a moment about the Cheshire Cat, the White Rabbit, the March Hare, or Tweedledee and Tweedledum. How much were these characters developed, really? They certainly weren't given any substantial amount of screen time. Of course, in the original text, Alice only meets each character for a short amount of time. However, this movie does not follow the same progression and the Mad Hatter and the Queen of Hearts are given about as much space in the original book as anyone else, so this amping up of their characters here seems like only an excuse to beef up screen-time of the few "human" characters. This is natural - human characters are relatable, easier to work with in terms of film-making itself, and obviously a much better part for any actor considering the role. However, I would have liked to see more from the rich tapestry of characters Lewis Carroll wrote into Alice. Tim Burton is known for writing his friends into parts and in the case of the Mad Hatter, it truly felt like a part written for Johnny Depp rather than a deeply thought out and well-written character.

Not only that, but the writing is oddly sentimental without much character development. Everyone is bosom buddies, which completely takes away from the tone the Alice story is meant to give. Characters that are meant to be nonsensical and highly ignorant are instead doing little else but helping out once or twice and then wandering hand in hand together like some sort of cheesy curtain call. The Mad Hatter is 'mad' in appearance and voice only for the most part - other than that he seems more like an eccentric who happens to do a silly dance at the end. The dance sums up the crux of the problem with the film. The Alice books contain a highly intelligent, witty form of nonsense, in which word play, riddles and pure madness serve to create a rich Wonderland. This tone has been captured quite well in several films based on the Alice books, however Burton's film decided to almost completely forsake Carroll's wit and interprets nonsense in a different way - ie random leg-flailing dances. I think I caught some bread-and-butterflies out of the corner of my eye, but having them in the background without drawing them into focus within the writing completely rejects the idea of them in the first place.

All in all, the movie felt a lot like a stand-alone film inspired by the Alice texts, which at first sounds exactly like what this movie ought to be. Unfortunately, not so. This movie is meant to be an interpretation of the books, and is actually meant to share commonalities with the original Disney film - which, I might add, worked very well to capture Carroll's tone. This movie tries to follow Carroll's - and the original Disney film's - concepts of Wonderland and it's characters. If the film offered a completely removed concept, it would have been a lot more effective - for an idea of what I'm talking about, see Syfy's Alice, which sets Alice as a contemporary heroine and Wonderland as a barren, drug-pumping wasteland. I couldn't help feeling as though Burton was trying to do both - his concept came off as really vague. He tried to capture the same Wonderland and tell us it was a completely different concept of the place at the same time, which in itself isn't an automatically awful idea. However, flashback scenes were short and done poorly, and not enough of the world itself was explored for this to be pulled off. Things like Alice's costume changes were good ideas that again were poorly executed - I'm going to assume that the inspiration for that came from the Kate Beckinsale film "Through the Looking Glass", in which Alice's costume changed inexplicably (and nonsensically, giving such costume changes a purpose other than just showing off impressive costume work, unlike Burton's film) throughout the movie.

Overall, I did like this movie. It was beautiful, and the plot progressed smoothly enough, even though I felt as though there was so much more Burton could have done with it. Bonham Carter's Red Queen would have made almost Carroll proud, although again, the point of his Queen of Hearts is that she couldn't be mapped out, understood and defined like Burton's was. Ultimately I think that if you want to do Carroll's characters and world justice then you have to do away with trying to make the characters understandable. I would have liked to see more flashbacks of the world as Alice had experienced it before, and less under-developed sentimentality in all the characters. I would have liked to see more of the world than the forest (for the first ten minutes) and then basically just the Red Queen's castle. I would have liked them to recite more than a stilted, imprecise version of Jabberwocky to do it justice or not bother at all. I would have liked, I would have liked, I would have liked….

What would you all have liked to see, Monster Friends? Did you love it to pieces like the majority of it's viewers, and if so, what do you think of some of the things I've brought up? Did you even manage to get to the end? :)

Monster Art: Arthur Rackham

2010-03-07T17:24:00.002+10:00

Hello friends! It is time for another instalment of Monster Art, where I try and broaden everyone's cultural horizons...but really just waffle on and post pretty pictures! Psyched? I know I am!

Anyway, so one of my very favourite artists remains Arthur Rackham. Rackham illustrated many popular stories and fairytales in the late 1800's and early 1900's, including Peter Pan, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass, and a lot of fairy tales of the Brothers Grimm.

His illustrations always whisk me away to another world. It's hard not to fall in love with his art when he managed to illustrate the majority of my favourite stories of all time, had such amazing pencil work, integrated colour so subtly, and created such a sense of eery whimsy in all of his work. So many artists cite Rackham as one of their favourite inspirations, and even filmmakers and other creatives (like me and my fellow writers, I suppose) have found inspiration in the tone of his pieces.

Anyway, thank you for letting me share another of my favourite artists with you. If you're interested, run a google image search - he did a lot of amazing Alice pieces that I'm sure any Alice fan (and who isn't an Alice fan?) would love. Like always, let me know your thoughts and maybe link me to one of your favourite artists :) Like I said in my post about Krista Huot, I have lots of favourite artists to share so if you enjoy art, stay posted! If not, um...go join a square-dancing class, you squares! ;)

This Thursday I'm Lovin'...

2010-03-04T13:43:00.007+10:00

Things I Have Loved Recently, That I Will Recount To You Today, Which Is Thursday

Digging to the bottom of my bag and finding two rogue five cent coins, meaning I had exactly the right amount of change for a tall coffee. Then going to the campus cafeteria coffee place, and finding they're now charging an extra ten cents. Why is this in the "happy list"? The lady working the counter would not hear of me downsizing from a tall, and spotted me the extra ten cents. How lovely of her was that?! It's not like I couldn't have had my mocha at all, I just would have had to settle for a small size! And then, after that, the barista handed me the most delicious mocha I have had in weeks. Thank you, life.

Rain. Rain rain rain rain rain rain rain. Walking someone without an umbrella to class, kicking off my cheap flats when I get inside because of how wet they are, pulling my jacket in tight around me, the sound it makes on my roof. Rain!

Oatmeal milk baths. Yeah, I'm bringing them up again. Yeah, I'm going to make you feel uncomfortable by telling you all how much I like touching myself after one of these bad boys. Deal with my amazing post-bath skin. Just deal.

Impending house parties. Planning on making "leprechaun bread", and guinness cupcakes with green baileys frosting for a St. Patrick's Day party. (If I manage to pull those off somehow, I will of course show you guys!) Trying to come up a costume for a video game costume party - most of the games I like aren't hugely well-known and I think most of the fun of costume parties is recognition. But I think I've come up with something that should hopefully be cute and will definitely be hilarious!

Being back at uni. I feel so crazily motivated recently, I hope I can keep it up. All I want to do is devour all my set texts, write until my brain turns to milkshake consistency, (gosh I could do with a vanilla milkshake right now...!) and just generally Rock Academia's Socks Off. This is so not me. This is almost - almost - a me I could get on board with. :)

Making Dolmio's three cheese pasta bake for the first time in forever. I don't even know how it's been this long, but my god, it is still my favourite thing to eat.

Conversations. Someone making me smile. Then I want to put my hand in a blender because he's probably not enjoying the conversations nearly as much, I probably don't make him smile, and he probably doesn't want to put his hand in a blender. But I don't even care if I'm hurting myself in the long run - in the short run, hey, look at me! I'm smilin'!

Getting another web article published on a site I really love and admire. Non=paid, but I don't even care - I just love writing for them, not to mention the experience and adding things to my writing portfolio. Plus, I get a blog link to here in my bio, so if any of you are reading this having popped over from mooky, hi!

Oh, and yellow nails. *heart*

What are you loving this Thursday, you crazy crustaceans?

Autumn, I Love You.

2010-03-01T11:57:00.003+10:00

Can we all just stop a moment to recognise the fact that Summer is no longer with us? I'm just going to come out with it: I. Hate. Summer.

I mean, I am a bit of a water baby and love the ocean, or lazy days in rock pools. I love coming home, stripping off my shirt and jeans and jumping straight into our pool in my underwear. I definitely love the ridiculously long holidays, spontaneous trips with friends, barbecues, seafood Christmases and Australia Days chugging vodka in a bikini and board shorts.

I even sort of love that hot sweaty feeling when you're driving in the car. And, err...sometimes, the sun feels really nice, you know, in, like...other...ways.

Yeah.

But I don't really do heat. I like a small sample of the things that come with it, but heat itself? Not so much. It makes me cranky because I can't nap in the middle of the day, and one time it made me pass out next to some alligators.

Autumn, beautiful Autumn, though, is like the best of both worlds. I can wear my jacket. I can sleep in. But hey, I can also go for a swim without dying of hypothermia, and I can also go to bed with a guy and lie there in his arms quite comfortably all night (well, all morning) without there even being a sheet on the bed. Autumn is coffee dates without feeling ridiculous about it, the pretty white Easter tablecloth my Oma made with cute embroidered hens and eggs in pastel colours dancing across it. Autumn is that wistful daydreaming leading up to my birthday. Baking green-frosted cupcakes and green-sprinkled fairy bread for St Patrick's Day. Rain, rain, rain. The lead up to my favourite season of all, Winter.

Go team Autumn, I say! Summer, you were okay while you lasted, but let's not pretend: we both know my heart will always lie elsewhere.

Lessons From Last Night

2010-02-28T09:41:00.003+10:00

Because I have nothing else to blog about, really:

Monster Girl's Lessons to be Learnt From a Weekend.

Give at least some thought to the issue before you start drinking mid-afternoon.
Brisbanites take note: everything at the Gardens Point Guild Bar tastes yummier. I didn't even know and would have sworn otherwise, but apparently I love rum.
Sometimes there is no right choice. Sometimes this means you have to do something that will make you hurt more than you thought you could hurt, or hurt forever in the long run.
Your friends will not be able to offer you any sort of proper advice in these situations. At best they will be able to produce some sort of pro-con list but in the end it is ultimately up to you.
Robert Downey Jr should probably be in everything.
Boys are immediately cuter when they're wearing a Star Wars shirt. Even really-not-that-cute-at-all guys. I have a feeling this is not a good thing. Nerd girls and boys that are that way inclined, beware.
Most men objectify all women, which means if you have a lot of guy friends, even the lovely ones are likely to talk about you in ways you couldn't even imagine when you're not around and they're with their mates.
You think you like cheap pasta and rice from that food court eatery? You have no idea how much better it can taste until you're shovelling that stuff down your throat at 8pm (god bless Friday late night shopping in the city) whilst drunk out of yo' pants.
If you are a messy eater and tend to chow down like someone's going to take your food off you in less than a minute so you better get it in quick, it is not easy to find a guy you can eat a plastic container stuffed with tofu brown rice and pumpkin pasta in front of. Rice gets places. Pasta sauce gets places. It just happens.
If you feel mildly self-conscious about how retarded you're eating in front of that guy, things are only going to get worse at breakfast the next morning. Maybe now is not the time to be exhibiting your skill for eating a McDonalds hotcake in one bite. Just sayin'.
Just because you're drunk does not mean you have anything interesting to say. Just because you want to fill silences or prevent things from getting awkward, does not mean that you should tell incredibly boring stories that go for far too long. Think about what is going to come out of your mouth. It's okay if it doesn't.
The good friends are the ones who sound a bit like your mum after you 'fess up to things.
If you find yourself getting frustrated in someone's company, get up and walk away. Maybe don't see them for a few days. Sometimes you just get mad at people but that doesn't mean they have to know about it. Don't make things worse for yourself.
Also, don't put yourself out for people that never put themselves out for you.
Snuggling is awesome and underrated.
It always pays to have more than a vague idea about geography when it comes to the city you live in. Know your suburbs. Know your public transportation system.
Always have deodorant in the bottom of your bag just in case. Even if you think you're only going to be out for a couple of hours. Because, sometimes a couple of hours gets multiplied by fifteen or so, and you're going to wish you had that deodorant. Or a change of clothes. Or a hose and some industrial-grade cleaning product. You can get rank pretty quickly when you're drinking/sweating/eating pumpkin pasta/sleeping in your clothes.
When you get yellow honey cream-cheese frosting on your jeans at a baby shower, wash them as soon as you get home, and then wash them again. Don't wait a few days, wash them once, leave it, and then put them on the next weekend without looking at them properly. Those stains do not look right.
Any sport in the Winter Olympics is infinitely more fun to watch when somebody falls down.

Not too cool for school

2010-02-24T16:41:00.004+10:00

In honour of my my internet being up and running again, and also in honour of my first week back at school...
Reasons Being Back At Uni Isn't Completely Terrible

Uni means you can put off freaking out about your future for at least a couple of years
...and feel like you're taking a giant leap towards that ideal future, even if you're only at art school and your degree pretty much won't help you out much in terms of getting a job.
You get to see all those friendly faces you haven't seen in what feels like a lifetime (Australian summer break is seriously ridiculous, we get close to four months off) and enough time has passed that they'll have forgiven you for, or forgotten completely about you spontaneously bursting into tears every time they tried to talk to you the last few weeks of uni last semester.
Studying what you love is kind of completely awesome, and when your set text list is basically just a list of books you wanted to read anyway and assessment just gives you an excuse to revisit your favourite Shakespeare plays, watch 10 Things I Hate About You or write stories relating to Frankenstein or Alice in Wonderland, it probably shouldn't even count as study or work at all.
Having at least some sort of structure to your week, is, (and I know you probably won't believe me here) actually Healthy and a Good Thing.
Every six coffees or whatever it is on your card, you get a free one. Which turns out to be awesome when you're running late to a lecture and can't be arsed digging about for loose change.
Toasted cheese sandwiches and soft drink combos at the guild bar for $5. Yep. Rad.
Lecturers that completely love what they are teaching, and/or make you giggle all the way through what is supposedly meant to be 2 hours of hell.
The noodles-in-a-cup vending machine. I feel like I've brought this up before but it's worth repeating.
Going back to school = excuse for new stationery. Again, I know I've brought that up before - hell, made a whole post about it - but the point stands.
Having to think at least somewhat about what you're wearing a few days a week is very refreshing and forces you to do laundry. And let me just say, I really needed to do my laundry.

Is anyone else recently back at school/uni/college or about to start? How's that all going for you? I hope you're loving it (so far) like I am! :)

Peace out, Monster Studiers.

Techless Monster Girl

2010-02-20T18:54:00.002+10:00

So we've kind of been without a home phone line or internet since Tuesday. I'm not going to lie to you guys, it's been rough. I'm relying on shoddy mobile phone coverage and at one stage I ran out of mobile phone credit so basically, if there was a fire and I wanted to call for help? Well, I couldn't. Scary, right! Okay, fine. I don't care about fires, I just want to know my little Petville critter is hanging in okay.

I'm not going to tell you the conditions I posted this in. Let's just say it involves a lot of dirt, mosquito repellent and plenty o' grass stains. Oh, and no shame.

Hopefully - hopefully! Our net will be back on Monday. Considering I go back to uni then and have many things to print for uni, it better be! Until then, cross your fingers and toesies for me, Monster Friends! I'll be with you after these short messages.

No Sansing Comic Sans!

2010-02-07T23:17:00.004+10:00

Can somebody tell me why everyone hates Comic Sans? I feel as though I should know; I've read of this hatred far and wide, and am clearly so far out of the loop I'm Loop Sans. Or something.

When I first got into the world of computers - okay, let's not go that far, here. Because we've had computers in my house since before I was born. But when I first started using them "properly", I suppose - you know, learning how to use the run and search functions, word documents, shortcut keys, how to install things, etc - when I first found myself eyeing the selection of fonts, it was comic sans that I chose. Why? I guess it appealed to my young (who knows how young, I'm guessing maybe twelve - what kid younger than eleven or twelve needed to type anything up before the very late nineties/2000, anyway?) sensibilities. "Comics? Comics are pretty rad." I probably thought to myself. I used to buy Sonic the Hedgehog comics back in the nineties with my brother, because THAT'S how cool I was. Comics Sans is childish and simple, yes, but I am not a flowery person, and Arial and Times New Roman just didn't do anything for me - too "mainstream, man!" And I was childish. Because I was a child. So, you know.

I don't know. Comic Sans is not the font I find the most visually appetising any more. A decade on, I've grown up and away from Comic Sans. But it will stay strong in my heart as I read over old stories typed up for or with my sister, or old msn chat logs. I don't regret you, Comic Sans. I don't even regret you, Jokerman. You served me well.

January

2010-01-31T18:25:00.001+10:00

I've suddenly gone up three readers! Bizarre, given my last post - I hope you guys don't like it when I'm down and out, Monster Friends! Because how would I even react to that? Milk it shamelessly to reel you all in? Do I sense a "The Ten Billion Reasons I Miss The Necronaut" post coming? Perhaps an "Ode to Facebook's Petville Application"? "The Most Satisfying Ways to Wallow"?

Sorry guys, I don't think any of those stellar reads will be dropping into your feeds any time soon. However, might I interest you all in "Pictures From Monster Girl's January"?

This Month, I

signed up for lookbook and immediately felt ridiculous about it

enjoyed a fantastic mocha over a good book at avid reader bookstore

rang in the new years with friends and party hats

snacked on a vanilla+coconut cupcake and charlie's limeade on the bus

celebrated australia day in the pool

discovered the joys of oatmeal milk baths

spent a lot of time with my favourite tot

and her guinea pig

browsed over the new yen mag with molly ringwald

hugged a storm trooper at the mall

watched my friend bonnie grow

took photos of my city

slept in and stayed in
I also
hit the valley with my friend Jon for a cult movie triple (Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, the Star Wars Holiday Special, and Dark Side of the Rainbow), worked enough to keep myself in mochas, toys, and dinners out, browsed around our local village keepsake stores with friends, had quite a few board game nights, did my laundry a couple of times, got heaps of texts from the Necronaut that started making me go insane, bought lots of fun books at the Lifeline Charity Bookfest, spent a lovely morning at the markets, went to the gold coast and hit up some theme parks, pretended I was a bride-to-be at a wedding expo to score free loot, co-hosted (sort of) a studio ghibli movie night, ate too much apple crumble, cheese toast and pasta at sizzler for lunch, had a chinese food feast with friends and discovered silly fortunes out of cookies, ate lots of veggie burgers at various barbecues, swam at Brisbane's favourite man made beach, had a mad op-shopping day hunting for tea sets, went on a couple of natural/non-prescription meds to try deal with my anxiety and depression, bought Kate Miller-Heidke's album, finally, watched a lot of 3rd Rock from the Sun.

So

2010-01-28T21:28:00.002+10:00

I don't really know what to blog about lately. Mostly because I think I may be severely depressed again, in that weird way when I feel pretty much absolutely fine but can't breathe properly, music really sucks, and walking is suddenly very, very hard even if it's towards somewhere you want to get to like lovely little local stores and cafes, or hell, the kitchen. No, I don't feel sad. I just can't fall asleep because I don't know if I'm really alive (and I have nightmares that Sylar from Heroes has been toying with me and breaking my heart in some psychotic way bit by bit, just so he can stomp all the life out of me before he eats my brain. Oh and the dream where the Necronaut tells me he loves me again and I wake up at 3am sweaty and throwing pillows at walls) and I don't feel like blogging or talking to anybody because a) I have this paranoid notion that we're all sort of robots and everyone is the same so there's not much point, and b) I've decided that Talking to People, along with Signing into Facebook, Not Cleaning My Room, and Not Reading a Chapter of Frankenstein are all Signs of Weakness.

Anyway, since you're all robots, it's like - what is there to say to robots, you know? Except you're not robots, and I generally love blogging, so I guessed I better pull my head out of Being Empowered By Poking Myself With Pins and Not Going on Petville long enough to type a post explaining why I'm not pulling my head out more often to type posts.

Or something.

Hope you're all kicking it fabulously, robot style.

And, you know, if any of you wanted to polyvore some hot robot fashion mashups and send them to my email inbox, I probably wouldn't hate that.

See you when I'm done being a psychopath or just can get my head around blogging again! Don't worry, I'm still reading all of your blogs :) And trying to reply if I'm feeling up to it.

Monster Girl Cooks: Parmesan Baked Eggs

2010-01-19T18:39:00.005+10:00

Parmesan baked eggs: sounds at least a little bit fancy, right? Well, I think so. Yesterday morning I decided to have a Breakfast Adventure (ie: not just coffee and toast) and whipped up some of these parmesan baked eggs and let me tell you now that it will be a recipe I will be coming back to when I am a forty year old soccer mum on Sunday mornings, hovering in my rightful place over the stove with the paper and a cup of tea beside me. (God, it sounds so stereotypical and suburban! And yet this was my own Mother at 40. I guess stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason!)
Monster Girl's Parmesan Baked Eggs
2 eggs (feeds one)1+ tablespoons of grated parmesan cheese, depending on taste (I went with two and a half, the original called for one)1 tablespoon of butterchivesherbs of choicesalt and pepper (might I recommend garlic salt?)
If your kitchen is anything like mine your first order of business will be tracking down something tiny to cook this in. The recipe called for a ramekin but being a ramekin-free kitchen I made do with a very tiny cake tin which would probably have been perfect if I had been following the original recipe which called for 4 eggs but as there were only 2, and as I was the only one eating, I halved the recipe, and it, and the cake tin, worked perfectly fine.
So once you have something to cook the eggs in, preheat your oven to an average temperature (180 degrees for all you Australians, I think that works out to about 320-330 ish maaayyyybe for Americans, please look that up for yourself because I didn't research that AT ALL) and then whisk up everything together excluding the chives. The original recipe didn't call for butter but I decided to add some melted butter to the mix because I always found that really added that extra something when I made omelettes for The Necronaut. The butter definitely worked in these baked eggs as well :) The recipe also didn't call for herbs other than the chives, but I decided to add some general mixed herbs and, again, it worked great. Throw everything into your ramekin or equivalent, top with a sprinkling of chives, and cook for 15 minutes. I hate to add this, because I say this at the end of absolutely every recipe I seem to blog here, but I thoroughly recommend serving with a big glass of milk and some liberally buttered toast. What? If it isn't broke, don't fix it. :)

The cake tin meant that presentation wasn't exactly A-grade, but it definitely tasted great! If you're not absolutely in love with parmesan, though, I'd suggest being a bit frugal with it to see how you like the taste of it in your eggs. I definitely wouldn't have put any more than I did in mine, but probably wouldn't have put any less in either!
What's your favourite easy thing to whip up for breakfast?

back to school, back to school! sung like Billy Maddison

2010-01-15T13:16:00.004+10:00

Next month I return to the world of university and I have to admit I think I've forgotten how to even be a student. Summer holidays are ridiculous. I would gladly shave off a week or two from either end of the Summer holidays to tack onto the mid-year break in June/July just so everyone can completely relax and regroup like this then as well. Having basically four months off is wonderful but maybe a tad excessive when all the other breaks are at most three weeks in length! Spread it out, guys!

Here are the classes I'm taking this year, in case anyone is interested. I mentioned a few of them back in November, I think, but to refresh -

Great Books: Creative Writing Classics
Shakespeare, Then And Now
Stylistics And Poetics
Wonderlands: Literature And Culture in the 19th Century
Feature Writing
Film And Television Scriptwriting
Media Writing
Corporate Writing And Editing

How amazing do some of those sound? To try and get myself back into the school frame of mind, I'm going to start reading all my books for class, like I told you all I would do a month or two ago. Whoops. I've borrowed the books I just haven't started! I'm also going to start having movie nights with the film versions of everything on my class reading list and gigantic bowls of pasta. What could be a more delightful to get back into the educating swing? Oh, right - stationary.

All stationary sourced from Etsy.com

Monster Girl Cooks: Penne Alla Vodka

2010-01-07T12:56:00.003+10:00

Monsters, I need to thank Mam for this one. While twittering away about my love for vodka, she recommended penne alla vodka, which I had never even heard of before. Could such a thing exist? Vodka and pasta, my two great loves, caught together in a grand dance of cheese and cream? Hell to the yes. I was lost before I'd even hit google. I decided to base my experimentation off a Nigella recipe (maybe not as authentic and probably not even as tasty as Mam's family's recipe, but Nigella is a goddess so it seemed like a good start) and go from there, and ended up, folks, with the best pasta I've ever made myself in my life. The recipe probably needs perfecting - and to be thrown together with all the ingredients, so Monster Girl isn't dashing around the neighbourhood at 9pm shouting, "onion! who will bring forth onion!" and so on, but for a first go I kicked it out of the ball park, in my humble opinion!
I thought I'd share my mad methods for the sane folk who bow at the altars of Vodka, Pasta and Parmesan. If you're on a no-carbs diet you might want to head for the hills, guys. Sorry!
Monster Girl's Penne Alla Vodka
(to serve one very very hungry person, or two not so hungry people)
1 onion1 can of diced tomatoesabout 2 cups of penne (I had more than enough for myself with 2 cups: I'd suggest around 1 and a half if only cooking for yourself, and 3 if cooking for two)cooking oilgarlic paste/minced garlic, or 2 cloves of garlic, depending on what you have handy (alternatively, you could use garlic oil instead of other oil and go without garlic itself)salt2 tablespoons of thickened/double cream2 tablespoons of butterabout 1/4 cup of vodkaherbs (I used parsley and oregano together, you might like to just use parsley, or use chives instead, whatever floats your boat)

Before I began, I put my water for the penne on to boil. Then to start with, I diced up an onion very finely and threw that in a pan with some minced garlic, a few sprinkles of salt and vegetable oil, stirring and baby-sitting until the onion was nice and brown and caramelising. (about fifteen minutes?) Then I added a can of diced tomatoes and tossed in my oregano and parsley. At this point I put my pasta on. On the packet it says to cook the penne for 14 minutes but because you continue to cook it after it's drained I took it out after 11 minutes. The diced tomatoes and onion needs to continue to cook for about 15 minutes after the tomato is added anyway so it's the perfect time to pop in the pasta. While the pasta was cooking I added the cream to the tomatoes and onion - I actually added way more than 2 tablespoons (I won't tell you how much) because I like my pasta nice and creamy, but the downside of this is that it does make the sauce too runny and very pink instead of that lovely red colour, so I'll be reigning in my impulses and sticking to 2 tablespoons next time.
When the pasta is cooked, drain it and then return it to its pan and stir in the butter (of which I added more than 2 tablespoons again, but won't apologise for this extravagance, unlike the cream incident) and add the vodka. IMPORTANT NOTE: I love vodka but this was one ingredient I was not about to be liberal with and you shouldn't either, fellow Monster Cooks. I added 1/4 of a cup, and while I was pleased with the result and found the vodka taste really worked, if there had been absolutely ANY more vodka than that added, it would be been overpowering and probably disgusting. As it was I felt like I was getting tipsy just from eating my dinner, so please be mindful and fight back the urge. In fact, if you're not sure about how vodka with pasta is going to go, or hell, if you have to drive home after dinner, might I suggest about 50ml or a bit less?
Okay, so once the vodka and butter are stirred through, pour the saucey contents of the other pan in with the penne. At this point you should be basically done, however I'd like to note that due to being cream-friendly my pasta was much too runny, and after having a nibble of a piece of penne I wasn't sure if it was a little too bland enough (it was incredibly hot so I couldn't tell properly.) Instead of doing the logical thing and waiting a bit for a bigger portion to cool on my wooden spoon, I grabbed a leftover jar of a beautiful tomato pasta sauce out of the fridge (about 1/3 of the jar was still in there) and threw all of that in with my penne! This served to adequately change the colour back to a healthy reddish rather than creamy coral which I was most pleased about. I am a wacky and impatient cook as you can probably tell by this stage.
I threw the pasta into a bowl (note: if you're not insane with your cream, yes, just throw yours straight into a bowl. But mine actually needed to be drained first! Bad cream-abuser Monster Girl, BAD.) and served with a hearty glass of milk and some liberally buttered bread, although if I had any or had the means and energy to make some myself, I would have served it with garlic bread. Though I didn't have any garlic bread, I did have parmesan cheese, and while I usually have flaky shaves of parmesan, the parmesan I use last night was more in the form of glorious thick strings, and was amazing - it didn't all melt into the pasta so much so you could really enjoy it as you ate.
My lovely dinner:

The pictures are all a lot bigger than usual because I, err, only just discovered the html share function on flickr. N00b. Sorry if they're too large! As usual, do let me know how it goes if you decide to cook it up, I'd love to hear about it, what worked for you, what didn't.
What did you have for dinner, Monster Friends?

If all the other bloggers jumped off a cliff...

2009-12-30T13:33:00.002+10:00

Well yes, if all the other bloggers jumped off a cliff then maybe I'd take a dive myself. Sue me! All the other bloggers are posting their Christmas loot, I guess that means I better hop to it! "Mindless!" some of you will cat-call. "Stuck for inspiration!" others will holler. And to those readers I say, "Have I ever pretended to be more than I am? Shut up and read about my haul, dammit!" No, I'm probably not going to blog extensively about my day other than this foray into materialism - it was a nice Christmas filled with family and feasting (I've been eating nothing but chocolate and shortbread ever since!) but quite frankly, I'm a little relieved to be on the other side of it. No offense or anything, Christmas, you're just exhausting.

I was sort of spoilt this year, readers. I got the usual edibles in my stocking like always but at the bottom this year I found a beautiful gold owl necklace with amber and cognac coloured stones. Isn't he lovely? He looks like a Horace to me. My Mum obviously wasn't feeling very imaginitve this year because I didn't get much at all that I didn't expressly ask for (and even the couple of items I hadn't requested were accidents...keep reading for a good giggle!) But I'm not complaining about anyone's lack of imagination because, hey - what Monster Girl wanted, Monster Girl received! (In a stunning turn of events.)

Monster Girl's Other Christmas Loot:

from my parents

Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist on dvd :)
Courtney Love's Dirty Blonde memoir
The Dead Weather album
a Joan Jett album
Two Jet albums because my mother thought Jet were Joan Jett,

(at which point everyone stops laughing for a communal chuckle. Yes, she thought Jet was Joan Jett. She was all, "I was wondering why none of the songs on the Jet albums were on the Joan Jett best-of album so I figured you should have those as well...I was wondering why there was only one "t" in Jet and two on the other Joan Jett album!" Um. What. The. Hell. Mum. Okay, continuing on.)

The Wonderland comic book hardcover compilation <3
Sylvia Plath's "Selected Poems", and
Sylvia Plath's "The Bell Jar." Which I already own. So I'll be taking that one back and getting Sylvia Plath's journals instead I think, which is a shame because this edition of The Bell Jar is a lot lovelier than the one I already had! Hehe.

from others

A Lisa Mitchell cd from my brother. I've been meaning to have a listen to Lisa Mitchell for ages but haven't actually expressed any interest in her before, so this was a surprise. My brother when I unwrapped it, "We (I have no idea who "we" is!!) were going to get you Sarah Blasko, but then we thought Lisa Mitchell looked more like you than Sarah Blasko." Sidenote: I also have never expressed any interest in Sarah Blasko. Hello, best reason to buy someone something ever. I was like, "uh...whaaat?" I love my brother. He also got me:
Xena season 6 part 1 on dvd! HELLS YES! All you readers of Monster Girl Writes know how much Xena means to me so I don't need to waffle on about it now, I guess. But man, yay!
500 Cupcake Recipes from my faux-sister. Yum! Some of these are totally destined to end up in this blog, so stay tuned,

and finally,

Mix cds, movies, iron-on dinoasuar transfers, a vintage lovely book, a pretty banner, an owl keyring, a heart shaped eraser and more from the beautiful Mam. She spoilt me rotten, readers!

Are you one of the many bloggers who have posted your Christmas hauls? Link us up, tigers! We can all have a read of each other's. If you haven't, what did you get? :)

I'll leave you with some snaps I took of the necklaces I gave Em from Be a Tiger before I sent them away to her mailbox, just because I think they're super pretty (polka dotted bows! wooden anchor and treble clef! beads!), and also because after that consumeristic post I feel like I should be reminding everyone and myself that it's more about the giving then the getting. If you're doing it right. ;)

Monster Art: Krista Huot

2009-12-27T16:12:00.004+10:00

I thought I would share with you all one of my favourite artists today. Over time I will hopefully share other art loves, of which I have many - Courtney Brims of course, and Arthur Rackham without a doubt! But today I just wanted to show you some of my favourite works from Krista Huot.

If you follow this little blog and I do end up profiling a few of my other favourite artists, you'll probably end up realising that my tastes in art are often predictable. Give me a fairytale-inspired, somewhat dark artist that is fond of woodland creatures, carnivals, goblins, pencil-drawing, rosy cheeks and long hair and you've won me. I hope that there's more to my cultural tastes then that but generally that's a pretty good rule! Krista's work, featuring mostly smokey-eyed, full-lipped girls that all give me a very strong Amanda Seyfried vibe, is inspired by classic fairytales and children's stories. Check out her beautiful pieces inspired by Alice in Wonderland, Red Riding Hood and The Wizard of Oz! She also plays with other well-known myths, characters and elements, and often her art is confronting as well as beautiful - her sacrificial rabbit, for instance. If you love beautiful girls, fairytales, fashion, a little bit of a sexy vibe, deer, unicorns, and, I'll go there, a bit of a feminist spirit (see "Four Unicorns of the Apocalypse") then you will love Krista Huot.

These are only a few pieces I happen to love, but her work is a lot more varied and you should check out her flickr photostream and website for yourself. Join her fanpage on facebook if you're into that! Don't forget to drop a comment here letting me know what you think - I'd love to hear your thoughts! Who are your favourite artists, Monster Friends?

it's christmas eve, babe, in the drunk tank

2009-12-24T13:09:00.003+10:00

Merry Christmas Eve, everyone! It doesn't feel like Christmas at all to me if I'm being honest - I haven't had that feeling of "Christmas" in several years, (and it's not exactly easy when all you want for Christmas is hope that you might one day not want to throw yourself in front of a bus/hope that you might once again belong to a boy who doesn't even seem to mind whether or not you throw yourself in front of a bus) but in leu of running away to New York, which is the plan most definitely for next year, I'm making do. I hosted a Christmas dinner on Tuesday with my friends and we had a lovely time sharing horrific Christmas cracker jokes (Monster Girl secret: I absolutely love lame cracker jokes!) eating way too much potato bake, pasta salad and roast pork - or in vegetarian Monster Girl's case, veggie-mince pie - and drinking too much 'nog, exchanging gifts and staying up till a crazy hour playing this board game "Life" that I gave my friends Jess and Mason. Most people seem to be familiar with the game, however I'd never played it before, which I am going to use as the excuse as to why I lost so dramatically. I did, though, end up with six children, a staggering amount more than the rest of my friends. (My imaginary board-game "life partner" Jenny and I adopted two little girls, Lucy and Abigail, before being blessed with twin boys, Ben and Max. Next came our precious surprises, Thomas and Jeremy... and I am sad to report that yes, I was the only one naming my in-game spouse and children.)
In return I got coconut rum balls and the beautiful nesting doll measuring cups I had mentioned in a previous post from Jess, as well as homemade gingerbread men and a cute owl print tee from threadless from my friend Reed, an IOU 1 hr massage from my certified friend Bonnie, and a bag of christmas biscuits from my faux-sis. I get my big present tomorrow night at family Christmas! She got hers early with the rest of my friends because it went with the "theme" - I got all my friends different board games so we can have lots of board game nights next year. :) All our board game nights up until this point have been the same old jenga and scattegories every time, so I thought it would be refreshing to have a few more options!
In other Christmas news the tree is decorated, all my family presents are wrapped in brown paper with a beautiful print on it, and I finally made myself the owl Christmas shirt I'd been planning on making for a couple of months! I was going to post a sort of "tutorial" or run down if you will here but I had forgotten how bad I am at sewing, haha. And I'm still working on the iron-on transfer - I hope to add "Owl be home for Christmas" above the owl, hee. (I told you I love lame cracker jokes, what do you expect from me?) So no tutorial, but I'll post the photo of the work-in-progress now. Please don't look too hard at the stitching!
Despite not feeling particularly Christmassy, tomorrow should be nice - a grand breakfast of croissants with honey and maybe dippy eggs with soldiers, followed by a short present opening session with the family - not many to open now that the kids are grown, really - an early sort of dinner of seafood (I make an exception once a year and will eat seafood with my family on Christmas day for tradition's sake, but no other meats) and a veggie roast with my brother and his girlfriend once they return from lunch with her family, then a big family Christmas party where I get to give my faux-brother his presents. Plus, I have a parcel here from Mam that I am dying to open but saving for tomorrow, and did I mention the cute cards I've been getting? Em from Be a Tiger drew a jolly smiling green anchor wearing a santa hat on the front of hers! I'll let you know how it all pans out, but you promise to let me know about your Christmases too, won't you Monster Friends? Good!

Holiday tip: pop your egg nog into a blender with a few (generous) teaspoons of baileys and a couple of (also generous) scoops of ice cream. Sprinkle some ground nutmeg on top and you've got yourself a party!

My Littlest Christmas Contribution

2009-12-17T17:23:00.006+10:00

It might sound completely cheesy but one of my favourite presents to buy each Christmas is always the gift I put under the K-Mart Wishing Tree. I suppose it's because I know how much the child I am buying for, although faceless and nameless to me, will appreciate a brand new toy just for them on Christmas Day. I always wish I could see them open it, see if they like it - I always wonder just who my little contribution will go to, how in need they really are and if they got many other Christmas presents.

On my way into the store, I always pick a tag filled in for a boy, around six or seven years old. When I first started buying presents to put under the Wishing Tree it was at the request of my parents, and since back in those days finances came in the form of meagre pocket-money, I often didn't have much more to spend than the cost of a Hot Wheels matchbox car and maybe a little Batman keyring or something. Over the years, past the pocket-money stage and no longer required by my parents to participate, I have stuck with the tradition, and have stuck with buying for boys six or seven. Every year for many years, some unknown little boy gets a Hot Wheels car and a Star Wars toy. :) I like keeping the Force strong in the latest generation, and I guess I always figure, what little boy doesn't like playing with a toy car, right? Hell, I used to enjoy the old monster truck rampage. Even my queer faux-brother got into toy cars on occasion when he was little, and he was a heck of a lot girlier than I was! Plus, buying for little girls always intimidated me. Go figure.

Anyway, this year K-Mart hadn't already filled in the details on the tags, so you had to fill out what gender and age child you wanted the gift to go to. I grabbed one and strode towards the toy section, when - what is this? A sale on Littlest Pet Shop toys? "You know what," I thought to myself, bravely, "Maybe it's time I brightened some little girl's Christmas instead." The Littlest Pet Shop toy line is a tad more gaudy and less nostalgic and kitch than the My Littlest Pet Shop toy line from the 90s, and so, indignant over such desecration, I hadn't taken much notice of the new toys since they came out. But looking at them today, I decided that in a weird, google-eyed way, I think they're actually kind of cute! Or at least, they're growing on me. Sure, give me the old 90s line any day, but the cute little owl with a feeding bowl was enough to persuade me, and I filled in my Wishing Tree tag for a little girl aged seven. I know when I was that age I was in love with the Littlest Pet Shop toys, so I can only hope my little owl will go to some young skinned-kneed little thing with an appreciation for animals and a Christmas Day that is now just that tiniest bit brighter.

And while I couldn't find a picture of the cute little owl, here is another one, with a deer! It's probably a good thing they didn't have this set, people, because not only would my little Mystery Girl be going home with one...well, so would Monster Girl! *shame* It's so wrong how much I actually want this!

Do you give to any charities for Christmas, Monster Friends?

Monster Girl's Christmas Cupcakes

2009-12-15T18:13:00.003+10:00

Hello, how scrumptious do gingerbread and cinnamon cupcakes with vanilla bean cream cheese frosting sound? I know.

So there I was, thinking about my gingerbread and cinnamon mocha from Gloria Jeans - because lord knows Monster Girl does little else with her day except sitting around pondering the contents of her stomach - when it struck me. "Someone's already invented gingerbread cupcakes, right? They MUST have." Hello google, how are you today? Of course someone had! Good thing too, because Monster Girl might be great at shameless tweaking of recipes, but she is not so great with making them up completely by herself. Let's not talk about the blue cake. Please. So with a little adjusting and playful cross-breeding of a few different recipes (I tend to just google until I find a recipe that lets me do what I want to do, I'm naughty like that) I created these bad boys. And I know you want to know how to make them too, because come on. Gingerbread and cinnamon cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. We already know you're sold, let's not play games here.

Cupcake Recipe

Ingredients:
½ cup self-raising flour
½ cup plain flour
¼ tsp bicarb soda
2 tsp ground ginger
1 tsp ground cinnamon
¼ tsp ground nutmeg
½ cup brown sugar
1 egg
100g butter, softened
¼ cup milk
2 tbsp golden syrup

Preheat to about 170 degrees C. Throw all the dry stuff in together, then throw in everything else. Get beater crazy! You'll want to beat for at least two minutes once everything's in - you'll notice the mix getting a lot lighter. This recipe makes about 8 big cupcakes, and 12+ smaller ones. You'll want to note that I doubled the cinnamon and ginger so the original recipe called for half those measurements, and also my 2 tablespoons of syrup were, uh...pretty liberal. ;)

Bake for half an hour. I forgot to keep an eye on these guys, or turn them halfway (our oven is hotter on one side, haha) and it totally did not even matter. They turned out perfect. My personal opinion is that these cupcakes are like slutty goddesses - easy and indestructible.

Now let's talk about what many consider to be the best part, shall we?

The Cream Cheese Frosting

Ingredients:
2 tbsp butter
50g cream cheese
2/3rd cup icing sugar
dollop of vanilla beans/splash of vanilla essence/lemon extract

Clean off those beaters from the cupcake mix, and have you way with them and the butter and cream cheese. Throw the sugar and vanilla in (I subbed lemon extract for vanilla beans AND a dash of vanilla essence, so decide for yourself what you'd prefer). Beat out all the lumps then throw your icing into a piping bag ready to ice the cupcakes once they're out and cooled. Um, or if you're Monster Girl, ice them while they're still hot, with a knife because you can't find your piping bag. Shutup, I was impatient - my faux-sis was waiting for me so we could watch The Grinch together.

I decorated with christmas sprinkles because I'm just that kinda gal. They tasted, well - exactly like gingerbread! Which, in my opinion, makes for a rocking cupcake indeed. They were a little bit crunchy on the outside and soft and dense in the middle, which was pretty fabulous, and the cream cheese frosting kicked it out of the park. I don't think this recipe is for everyone - it's definitely not a traditional cupcake, and you really have to be on Team Gingerbread, but personally, I really loved these. Some reviews:

"Janie, I am a fan. I'm going to make a facebook page about these."
and,
"Eh, the cake was alright but the cream cheese frosting OH MY GOD. No the cake was yummy too but GOD I LOVE CREAM CHEESE!"

So there you go. Go off and bake, Monster Friends, and tell me what you think.

Monster Girl Writes

The time has come...WordPress

TiNA in Trouble

R.I.P Veronica

Emerging Writers' Festival

Happy birthday Mumsy

Things I Love Thursday

To market, to market

The Ethical Tapdance: On Leather Shoes

Queensland Floods

Happy New Year, Monsters!

a holiday TiLT and what Santa brought me

Christmas in Brisbane

Why do you let me stay here?

R.I.P Troubadour

Five Gifts from Outside The Box

Things I Love Thursday

WOM+N - Form and Function Art Exhibition

Monster Art: Inside A Black Apple

Wherever I Lay My Hat

Dear Spiderman television,

Undressing TiNA

Happy Birthday DudeBestie!

What's in the Monster Bag: NYWF Edition

National Young Writers Festival, Sep 30 - Oct 4

Happy Birthday Blog! (and filling in the blanks)

"Pick up" Six

Australia as a Women's Space

Monster Vegetarian: Kuan Yin Tea House

Monster Girl Gaming: Harvest Moon

Things I Love Thursday

Girls Who Rock (and Sometimes Roll)

Scott Pilgrim vs. Monster Girl

Happy 21st, little brother!

Splendour Wrap-Up

Concerning Chemistry

Splendour in the Grass

Things I Love Thursday

"I am a pretty little dutch girl"

Dear Best Friend

The Kindness of Strangers (and everyone, really)

Interviewing: Audrey Bishop of the 200 Portraits Project

Australia's First Female Prime Minister

Anosmia: The Wussiest "Disability" Known To Man

A random musing on death and posting into the future

Monster Art: Courtney Brims

Be A Movie Friend

Hello June!

Parenting Practice and Kitties

On "If it ain't broke...but possibly might be soon"

Dear Monster Boy Readers...

Ewoks: Haters Gonna Hate

Free Comic Book Day 2010

Monster Girl Gaming: Alice in Wonderland (DS)

Immensely Frustrating Things Of Immense Frustration

On Turning 22

Things I Love Thursday

Happy Easter from Monster Girl!

Script Frenzy: Are You In?

Monster Girl Cooks: Savoury French Toast

Molly Ringwald and Monster Girl: Ready for their closeup

Brisbane's Mana Bar

Leprechaun Bread, Guinness Cupcakes and Crotch Shots

The Big Issue

Alice: The Monster Review

Monster Art: Arthur Rackham

This Thursday I'm Lovin'...

Autumn, I Love You.

Lessons From Last Night

Not too cool for school

Techless Monster Girl

No Sansing Comic Sans!

January

So

Monster Girl Cooks: Parmesan Baked Eggs

back to school, back to school! *sung like Billy Maddison*

Monster Girl Cooks: Penne Alla Vodka

If all the other bloggers jumped off a cliff...

Monster Art: Krista Huot

it's christmas eve, babe, in the drunk tank

back to school, back to school! sung like Billy Maddison